From Prison Manager To Author

I wrote ‘The Handbook for Highly Sensitive People’ to help HSPs to thrive rather than just survive in this non-sensitive world. One in five or 1.4 billion people globally have the innate temperament trait of high sensitivity. I am one of them, but for the first thirty-two years of my life I didn’t know about the trait. I was just convinced that there was something wrong with me. I processed everything so deeply, was highly empathic and could pick up on subtleties that others weren’t aware of.

As a child this was deeply confusing. I also had several angelic experiences. Growing up, I was frequently told to ‘stop being so sensitive’ or that I was ‘too sensitive for my own good’ but I didn’t know how to stop something that was simply part of me. I felt deeply flawed. I ended up putting strong emotional walls around myself for protection.

At thirty-two, I was a divorced, single parent to a nine-year-old son. I was working part time as an alcohol misuse worker in a prison and studying part time to be a psychotherapeutic counsellor. It was during that training that I was given a book about HSPs written by the respected US psychologist Dr Elaine Aron. Her book changed my life. I finally had some validation about who I was, and that there was nothing wrong with me.

The following year, I was promoted into a senior management position as a prison governor. I was responsible for managing the staff within my department and for overseeing the rehabilitation of offenders with drug and alcohol problems

Working in a prison seems like something of a paradox as an HSP, but in a way it reflected my own self-imprisonment back then. My inner walls of protection were still up, and I had locked parts of myself away, as well as my childhood dream of being an author. I didn’t realise it at the time, but I was going through my own ‘rehabilitation’ of sorts, one that had nothing to do with drugs or alcohol. One of the meanings of the word rehabilitation is ‘to restore something back to its original condition’ and that’s what I ended up doing by finding my authentic self again and by embracing my sensitivity.

Two years later, I received angelic guidance that I would be writing a book about HSPs. I didn’t know how I would find the time. I had qualified as a counsellor, an auricular acupuncturist and spiritual healer, I had set up my own part time private practice, also started training in regression therapy and was still working at the prison. But that guidance rekindled my dream. I kept journals about my own journey and experiences from the various trainings, and I was also conducting my own research about HSPs with my private clients. All of this eventually formed the foundations of the Handbook.

Fast forward to the age of 40, the nudges about writing the book were getting stronger, but that year my beloved Dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I took a voluntary redundancy and left the prison service so I could spend the last three weeks of his life with him. It was a heart-breaking time but also a wakeup call for me to start making my dreams a reality.  

At 43, I went on a Writer’s workshop run by a well-known publisher. I submitted a synopsis to them as part of a competition to win a publishing contract the following year and although I didn’t win, I ended up having a meeting with the MD. She gave me some valuable advice about the direction of the book and the need to build an author platform. I naively thought that they might publish it once I did what she advised, but it wasn’t meant to be.

The platform building/social media side was a slow process as I wasn’t tech savvy. But I had finally started writing the manuscript. In 2017, I submitted the revised synopsis to several agents, but the rejection emails followed. The angelic guidance kept telling me to persevere, and that the book would get published ‘within divine timing’.

One morning, I woke up feeling disheartened. I shouted out ‘I don’t know what else I can do to get this book published, so over to you Angels, I give up!’ I switched the TV on and listened to an interview with Jeremy Vine (broadcaster and journalist). I had a strong intuitive feeling to acknowledge something he said, so I did via Twitter.

He then messaged me, and we ended up having a telephone conversation that evening. He invited me to talk about HSPs on his BBC Radio 2 show which I did in March last year. He also mentioned on it that I had written a book and was looking for a publisher.

The following week an author tweeted me and she sent an email to her editor at Watkins Publishing. Jeremy saw the tweet and tweeted Watkins too. The next day the editor contacted me, and a few weeks later I secured a publishing contract. Jeremy wrote the foreword. He’s an HSP, as is my editor. Talk about angelic intervention and the law of attraction! My book will be published in the UK and USA on the 15th of this month.  

I want to continue raising awareness by writing about sensitivity in other genres. I have just finished the first drafts of two children’s books which feature HSP characters. If the trait is recognised at an early age and highly sensitive children feel understood, accepted and nurtured, it’s more likely that they will grow up without feeling flawed, lonely, or like they don’t belong in this world.

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Mel Collins is a qualified Psychotherapeutic Counsellor, Spiritual Healer, Reiki Master, Intuitive and Auricular Acupuncturist with my own private practice in Devon. I studied extensively under the Jungian Psychotherapist, the late Dr Roger Woolger in Deep Memory Process (Past Life Regression) and Ancestral Healing. My continuing professional development has included studies in CBT, Motivational Interviewing, Shamanism, Spiritual and Psychic Development, Tarot and Meditation. I have been self-employed for nearly eight years. I run workshops, courses and talks about my work and I have professionally recorded three Meditation CDs. Two of them complement the chapters on Energy Protection and Self Love in the book.

Find out more about Mel on her website: www.melcollins.co.uk

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About The Handbook For Highly Sensitive People

Are you often told to stop taking things to heart or to toughen up? Do you have a lot of empathy for others? Overanalyze things and get ‘stuck in your own head’? Or become easily overwhelmed and frequently need to withdraw? If the answer is YES, you are probably a Highly Sensitive Person and this Handbook will be your survival guide!

One in five people are born with the trait of high sensitivity. Yet, there is a general lack of awareness of the trait in our society, which leaves many people struggling physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually with being highly sensitive in a non-sensitive world. More often than not, HSPs are yearning for acceptance of their trait, not just from other people but also for themselves.

When they realize their sensitivity is ‘normal’ and it’s acknowledged in a positive way, a deep sense of relief arises and they can begin to flourish – feeling empowered to bring their unique abilities of empathy, compassion, creativity, healing and much more into the world.

Presented in four sections that lead the reader on a journey of true holistic self-understanding, the book starts with a section exploring the main qualities and challenges of the trait, and how it can be a real gift in life; not a flaw.

The second section then delves into impacts of living as an HSP, such as the many masks that they tend to wear (people-pleasing and so on), the relationships they attract, and how they can start on the journey to feeling more valued.

The third section provides a wide range of practical strategies to manage the trait more effectively, from more self-love, coping with over-arousal, tapping for emotional freedom, energy protection, dealing with loss and bereavement, and tuning into the healing power of animals. And the final section touches on the more spiritual aspect of life that many HSPs are searching for, whether knowingly or not – from past-life themes to the unseen world, such as angels – in their quest to fully accept themselves, and to live the authentic, fulfilling lives they deserve.

 

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Category: On Writing