Why Women Should Write By Theresa Slater

I’ve been plagued by imposter syndrome most of my life. I convinced myself I was “less than” — not educated enough, not worldly enough. You get the idea. I never recognized or named this warped sense of self until I wrote my first book. The process of writing became a journey to self-awareness.

My love of writing started early on. From a teenager keeping a diary to a business owner creating blog posts, there’s something cathartic about putting down your thoughts. Yet the idea of writing a book only came to me after recounting my life story to people, only to have them remark, with jaws half dropped, “You should really write a book” That reaction suggested to me that my story was either fascinating and inspiring or so unusual that it was unbelievable. The second possibility stopped me from putting pen to paper — or fingers to a keyboard.

However, there came a day when I was asked to speak about my industry and how I built my business to a very crowd of successful business owners — in a prestigious private club in the very big city of Philadelphia, and in front of Ivy League graduates and savvy business heavy hitters. It was honestly terrifying. I was at a crossroads. Should I tell the glossed over version of my journey, or tell the truth of how I came to be on my own at age 15 and had to pull myself out of my desperation as an act of survival.

I decided it was time. I told the unabashed truth and then held my breath. Surprisingly, the response was overwhelmingly positive. Many people took the time to approach me and ask questions, congratulate me on the success of my business, and tell me how much they enjoyed my story.

Their interest and acceptance were the catalyst for what was to come.  You see, in that crowd was a book editor. She waited at the end of the line of handshakes and then approached me. “Have you ever considered writing a book?” she asked.  And I was off. Because of the positive reaction from the crowd, because of their interest and acceptance, I finally felt I could tell my true story.

I was lucky. I had written blog posts for more than 15 years. I had those postings and personal writings to pull from. These helped me mold my history and thoughts. I also had an editor who encouraged me when I was exhausted from writing and kept me on track. (Any new author should and can find an editor to help guide you.)

I told my family and close friends that I was writing a book. Once it was public, I had the outside pressure of a finished product. And I learned that I wanted a record of who I was — to look past the embarrassment of my struggles in life and to take a hard look at what I’d overcome. I began to feel proud of the fact that I’d been resourceful, had gained street smarts, and was creative in my employment and education. And that I built a successful business.

I pulled out books on similar subjects and made note of what inspired me. Those were my touchstones for deciding what I’d include. It also showed me what had been overly published. How many books on ‘work-life balance’ or ‘women hitting the glass ceiling’ can you digest? I made sure to take my book in a different and fresh direction.

I also learned that my history and my memories were completely and solely mine. I had a conversation with my sister about an important event that had shaped my childhood — an event pivotal to my story and the book. She remembered it entirely differently. I went to my brother for validation of this memory and his response reassured me. “Your memories are your memories,” he said. “You have a right to remember them shaped by your reactions, your emotions, and your personal circumstances.” All three of us had different perspectives of one incident, however that didn’t invalidate my memories. I learned not to change my memories to make someone else feel comfortable.

When I was nearly finished, I looked for endorsements. I chose carefully who I wanted to share a few pertinent chapters with. One testimonial from a Syracuse University professor in the business school wrote, in part, “…You are giving voice to what many potential entrepreneurs go through with impostor syndrome and self-doubt.”  That testimonial stopped me in my tracks. I pushed back from my desk and thought, How can he say this? He has no idea who I am.

The truth is that he’d nailed it. I began reading articles on imposter syndrome and self-doubt. One description stopped me cold: “Perceived discrepancy — discounting achievements and attributing success to external factors such as luck.” This completely described me. And it’s most particular to women. How many times had I said, “I faked it ‘til I made it” and “My success was due to ‘dumb luck’?”

My book has now given me a new lens in which to see myself — my past and my journey. It’s also given me the motivation and courage to continue to promote and tell my story. I hope it will inspire other women to tell theirs.

 *   *   *

Theresa Slater is the President of Empire Interpreting Service, which she founded in 2003. She built her company into a respected, award-winning organization with more than 300 interpreters and an array of customer-centric services. A speaker, author and advisor to new entrepreneurs, Slater’s love for business drives her on her path. Slater’s new book, The Language of Success: An Interpreter’s Entrepreneurial Journey (Business Expert Press, Aug. 30, 2024), is both autobiography and a how-to (or how not-to) guide for entrepreneurs. Learn more at www.empireinterpreting.com.

Tags: featured, women writers

Category: Contemporary Women Writers, How To and Tips