The Curse of the Erotic Writer

June 9, 2011 | By | 14 Replies More

I’ve been writing erotica for around six years now, five of them published.

On the whole it’s brilliant. Readers appreciate the work (even if some people don’t admit to reading it!) and the community of erotic writers is fantastic. There’s no competition, back stabbing or bitchiness. Everyone is wonderfully supportive and encouraging. I couldn’t ask for a better bunch of colleagues, albeit remote ones.

Sadly though, us erotic writers do have a curse.

It is the curse of the people that don’t “get” it. They’re often non-writing folk, and tend to assume that because we write naughty or kinky things that we’re getting up to said naughty or kinky things, too.

Some of us are, but who cares? As long as the action is between consenting adults and nobody is getting hurt (unless they want to be, of course πŸ˜‰ ), then why does it matter?

However, there are many erotic writers that pen tales of whips and chains, threesomes, one-night stands, flings and more, that don’t even come close. We’re happily married, or with a partner and any sexy things happen within the confines of our relationships and behind firmly closed doors. We’re not promiscuous, nor are we swinging from the lightshades. We just have damn good imaginations.

Luckily, most of us can live with these assumptions on our characters and just laugh them off. The people that matter know the truth about us, and that’s all that matters.

Bit Height

Lucy Felthouse’s paranormal lesbian erotic romance novel, Bite with Height

Unfortunately, though, some people believe that because we’re open minded that we’ll take kindly to outrageous flirting and inappropriate comments. Thankfully, I haven’t been subject to it myself, but I know people that have been harassed, propositioned and more, simply because of what they write. None of them asked for or encouraged it. In fact, the only thing they did to warrant receiving such inappropriate behaviour was to write erotica.

I’m sure you’ll agree that’s absolutely out of order. Erotic writers are no different to writers in any other genre, except for the subject matter. I’m sure crime authors don’t get asked to go and solve crime, or get accused of being criminals. Equally, paranormal authors don’t get sent stakes and garlic to help protect them from vampires. So it sucks (if you’ll pardon the pun) that some of us experience this problem. What we do doesn’t make us OK with harassment or inappropriate comments. We deserve the same level of respect given to writers in other genres – and we demand it.

Thanks for listening to my little rant, everyone. I know I’m preaching to the converted here, but I had to get it off my chest.

And now this non-vampire, non-lesbian chick is going to post the blurb from her latest release, paranormal lesbian erotic romance, BITE WITH HEIGHT:

When Meg spots a young woman alone in the Pigalle district of Paris at night, she’s intrigued. She has to know her story and find out why she looks so sad and alone. After introducing herself, Meg realizes that she and Grace have a lot in common. But when they decide to go and grab a drink together, they discover a mutual love that could bond them forever.

Get your teeth (sorry, it had to be done!) into this hot read from the Noble Romance website: https://nobleromance.com/Books/298

There’s also a hot excerpt available. You can see my full backlist on Lucy Felthouse.co.uk,Β my website.

Follow Lucy on Twitter @cw1985. On Facebook. Her YouTube Creative Writer 1985 Channel.

Check out Lily Harlem’s teaser,Β and a guest post by Lucy Felthouse on Skhye’s Ramblings.

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Category: British Women Writers

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  1. Lucy Felthouse – Erotic Author » Blog Archive » Frisky Friday! | June 10, 2011
  1. Lillian Avon says:

    Hi Lucy
    I must admit that I too was guilty of thinking that erotic writers were sexually deviant but I got an education when I invited erotic fiction writer Mitzi Szereto to run a workshop at the Bournemouth Literary Festival which I was running a few years ago. She was a normal young lady whom you would never assume was a prolific erotic fiction writer. I will never make that assumption again about anyone who writes a specific genre. After all writers who write murder thrillers are not closet murderers!

  2. Sasha says:

    How do you get a publisher and get established?

    • Hi Sasha, thanks for commenting. I hope that Lucy may be able to reply as well. On my part, it’s really a matter of significant study that needs to be done over time. Each area, from writing, to editing, to finding an agent, to building a platform, to finding a publisher requires time and experience and research to get good at. Keep reading, keeping searching Google for answers to your questions. – Anora McGaha

  3. Nicola says:

    I used to feel the need to tell people “I just made it up OK!” before they read any erotica I wrote. Then when it got a publishing deal the final person I had to say it to was my mum. I’ve stopped saying it now because I know people will think what they like – the same way they think actors are the characters they play.

  4. Amelia James says:

    In real life, I’m quiet and shy, a real wall flower, but in my imagination I’m bold and sexy. That’s what writing romance and erotica is all about for me–the chance to be someone else and do things I never could. I imagine it’s the same for any other genre, but sex was forbidden to me when I was growing up, so I’m catching up through my writing.

  5. I’m excited to have gotten so many responses to this!

    All I’d say is… you gotta have thick skin πŸ™‚ But then I think any writer does, regardless of genre.

  6. Laura says:

    I’ve written adult content, non-fiction and fiction, for years. I keep working in the adult area because there is a freedom, a feeling of not having the restrictions I live with day to day to be nice, good and well behaved. It’s liberating to let go of being a nice girl.

  7. Amber says:

    If you think an erotica author has to do everything they write about, you have to ask whether a thriller author has to kill people or a sci-fi author has to be an astronaut. That said, does it help your real-life sex life? If you’re doin’ it right πŸ™‚

  8. Great post! When I first started writing, I was worried about this very thing. What if people judge me? What if they think that, because I write what my mother would have called “trashy romance,” I do all those things at home? And then I started writing gay romance. Talk about another whole set of questions! πŸ™‚

  9. Thanks for your lovely comments, everyone.

    I certainly wouldn’t discourage anyone from writing it because although sometimes controversial, it’s a great genre to be a part of, and let’s be honest… sex sells, even if people aren’t admitting to buying it! πŸ˜‰

  10. Barbie Scott says:

    Well said!

    Writing erotica is, like any other writing, a combination of imagination, inspiration and perspiration!

    And, like other genres, not everyone has the knack. It’s a talent to be proud of.

  11. Obviously I didn’t think it was ok to harass erotic writers just because they write erotica, but I have to admit I was intrigued by their lives a little! Especially since I have considered writing erotica myself, and then dismissed the thought based on my very boring house-wifey life…maybe I should reconsider!

  12. robin mcsmith says:

    something i have always wanted to do – have done only for fun!! Anne Rice was my first real encounter and she used an alias Anne Roquelure (sp?) she amazed me with her talent!! erotica is more difficult to write than we think – cheers to you!! and thank you for motivating me to attempt the challenge once again… even if just for my a father’s day idea for my partner for more than 28 years – gotta keep it fresh and growing cause it is all about passion (yes erotic, exciting and illicit passion)!

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