Finding Inspiration in Failure By Barbara Claypole White

In my second novel, THE IN-BETWEEN HOUR, my protagonist is a celebrity author on the cusp of a career crash and burn. The hero of his best-selling series, Agent Dodds, is dangling from a helicopter, and all Will can think is, “Let go, dude. Just let go.”

Unlike Will, I’m not one of the big guns. I’m a midlist author with a weird niche—hopeful family drama with a healthy dose of mental illness. And despite five award-winning novels, I’ve been struggling to hang on through the harsh realities of publishing. This industry is all about the bottom line: sales figures. If you fail to deliver those goods? Game over. It seems logical, therefore, that authors would make smart, safe decisions. I know this, and yet I have deliberately—and with enthusiasm—chosen a path with the potential for catastrophic failure.

Let me back up two years. I was off contract for the first time and stymied by the question, “If you could write anything, what would it be?” Here’s the problem with my answer: the story of my heart would be a career-killer. It involved bringing back a character not only from a previous novel, but one that was going out of print. Quite simply, the numbers didn’t even hold the possibility of adding up.

Ever since THE UNFINISHED GARDEN launched, I’ve wanted to revisit my first tortured hero, James Nealy. Successful and sexy, James is locked in a private war with obsessive-compulsive disorder. He also came from my darkest fear as a mother: What if, when my young son grew up, no one could see beyond his quirky, obsessive behavior (OCD) to love him for the exceptional human being he is—empathetic, gifted, and compassionate? Through James, I accidentally discovered my desire to create characters who battle invisible disabilities, but I only scratched his surface. James had a great deal more to say, and sales weren’t good enough for a sequel. I put the idea aside, but James stayed in my head. (He doesn’t know how to quit.)

After I finished novel five, THE PROMISE BETWEEN US, I became infatuated with another character: washed up actor and male nanny, Jake Vaughan. He also wasn’t done talking to me. I wasted months going down a dead-end hole with his story, although the idea revealed a spunky female character—Maggie King. “Right,” I thought. “Maggie’s my next protagonist.” Then I really screwed up, because I adopted a new process that tied my brain in knots.

A year of work resulted in an abandoned manuscript and a large pile of recycling. However, it gave birth to another character with potential: struggling gin distiller Luca Heywood. Eventually I figured out I’d artificially squished Maggie’s story and Luca’s story together. As I attempted to untangle the mess, I kept returning to the question: What did I want to write? And there was James tapping his thigh, saying, “Now will you listen?”

Not quite. I dragged my family though months of agonizing, until the morning I gave my poor husband a ride to the airport. As I pulled up to the curb, he tossed me a brilliant suggestion: “Write Luca’s story, call it THE GIN CLUB, and bring back all your heroes, not just James.” I thumped the steering wheel in glee, and my gut screamed yes.

I’ll tell you a secret. I often create scenes with my old heroes when I can’t sleep—to see how they interact. It’s been my equivalent of counting sheep for years, but underneath I knew some of these guys would connect one day on the page. After all, they’re practically neighbors.

THE GIN CLUB effortlessly weaves together all my dangling threads: my sleepy-time random scenes, the desire to write more James, my fixation with Jake, and la viola! Maggie King appeared in chapter three. Three drafts in, the manuscript has evolved into the story I always wanted to write. And I have accepted that it might fail.

Nothing about this project makes sense for my career. My genre is women’s fiction, and I typically write about strong mothers and families in crisis. THE GIN CLUB is populated with messed-up middle aged men lost in fatherhood. Think Book Club meets Revenge of the Nerds , but with really, really sexy nerds. Maggie’s an important secondary character, but I have no female point-of-view chapters. Even worse, my ex-heroes—the gin club—come from two different publishing imprints. It might be worth repeating: nothing about this project makes sense.

However, when I was an author-in-waiting, I was told repeatedly that James was too dark for a love interest. Each rejection spurred me on with a let’s-make-him-darker mindset. It worked, because I landed my agent, a two-book deal, and the Golden Quill for best first book. And on July 2nd, I’m finally releasing the audio version of THE UNFINISHED GARDEN.

Ninety percent of survival in publishing is perseverance. The other ten percent includes passion and luck. I can’t address the luck, but I have bucket loads of perseverance and passion.

I’m hoping that THE GIN CLUB finds a home. If it doesn’t, I’ll venture into self-publishing. Now that I’ve found the right story for James and Jake—and Maggie and Luca—I’m hanging on. Consequences be damned. Y’all can remind me of that when I’m working as a tour guide at a local gin distillery. ☺

—

Bestselling author Barbara Claypole White writes hopeful family drama with a healthy dose of mental illness. Born in England, she works and gardens in the forests of North Carolina, where she lives with her family. Her novels include: The Unfinished Garden, which won the Golden Quill for Best First Book; The In-Between Hour, a SIBA Okra Pick; The Perfect Son, a Goodreads Choice Awards Semifinalist; Echoes of Family, a WFWA Star Award Finalist; and The Promise Between Us,a 2018 Nautilus Award Winner.

Barbara is an OCD advocate for the nonprofit A2A Alliance, which promotes advocacy over adversity. To connect with her, please visit www.barbaraclaypolewhite.com

THE UNFINISHED GARDEN

A love story about grief, OCD, and dirt 

Tilly Silverberg is rebuilding her life with her young son, Isaac, one potted-up plant at a time. Since her husband’s death, gardening has become her livelihood and her salvation. Hiding out in the North Carolina forest, she wants only to be left alone with Isaac and her greenhouse.

New to the area, successful software developer James Nealy needs a garden. On a solitary mission to reclaim his life from irrational obsessions and relentless compulsions, he has a plan: to conquer his greatest fear. Dirt. One glimpse—or two—of Tilly’s garden, and he knows she holds the key. But when he asks her to take him on as a client, she refuses.

After a family emergency pulls Tilly and Isaac back to her native England, she’s quietly happy, because nothing has changed in her childhood village. Or has it? Her first love is unexpectedly single, her mother is scheming, and her best friend is keeping secrets. Then James appears on her doorstep.

Tenuous at first, but gradually taking root, James and Tilly forge an unlikely bond. As they work together to rescue a garden choked by neglect, they unearth each other’s secrets, each other’s fears, each other’s hopes—and maybe, a shared second chance.

“White’s transoceanic love story deftly explores the challenges of conquering fears and relinquishing the past.”—Booklist 

…

Tags: featured

Category: Contemporary Women Writers, How To and Tips