MOM BABBLE excerpt: Crying In The Laundry
Mary Katherine (MK) Backstrom is the personality behind the thriving MOM BABBLE online community. Over 89 million people have viewed her video content, and she has over 1/2 million followers on Facebook, and 16.7K followers on Instagram. In her essays, she talks about ALL aspects of motherhood — the highs and lows and every weird, wild, and wonderful moment in-between. And her audience loves her for it, including TODAY with Hoda & Jenna, “Thank you for cracking us up.”
Now, for the first time, MK Backstrom’s many followers have the opportunity to read her heartfelt and hilarious essays in print. In MOM BABBLE, Backstrom offers hope, humor, and inspiration in a full-color compilation of 40 essays featuring MK’s thoughts, confessions, stories, and family photos that are sure to encourage any mom in need of some understanding and mom honesty.
In MOM BABBLE, MK writes not for perfect moms, but for just perfectly normal moms everywhere.
Says MK, “My hope for this book is that it can serve as a collection of winks and nods, from one mother to another. That my honest, messy stories of motherhood might encourage your spirit, the same way so many of you have inspired and encouraged mine over the years. I hope that when you hear my voice in these stories, you hear the voice of. Friend who is waving at you from within the pages.”
Every copy of MOM BABBLE purchased supports The Mighty Acorn Foundation and helps change the life of a child in Kitale, Kenya.
We are delighted to feature an excerpt from the book!
CRYING IN THE LAUNDRY (pp. 76-80)
Have you ever curled up in a pile of laundry because it seemed like a good place to cry?
Have you ever sobbed in front of a mirror because you were in so much pain and you just wanted to be seen, but the only person around to share your suffering with was, well . . . yourself?
Have you ever hurt so deeply that you were certain your body would just stop functioning?
Have you ever cried until your eyes were swollen, your tears ran dry, and your face looked like it was stung by a hive of killer bees?
Have you ever let the shower run hot to cold as your shoulders shook with the inner sobs that no longer carried any sound?
If so, you aren’t alone.
If not, well, this is awkward.
Here’s the thing:
I have come to realize the depths of my biggest fears and the sting of my deepest pains are little more than fossils of my life’s greatest beauty.
Maybe I’m sleep deprived. Maybe I need my meds adjusted. Or maybe it’s just that sometimes life is truly hard, and I think we need to share these pains to normalize the fact that people suffer.
We all do.
And maybe it’s good that we do, because I believe you can’t truly enjoy the beauty of life if you haven’t experienced the depths of its darkness.
Pain, you see, is the anchor of joy.
We can’t have one without the other. Pain and joy are two sides of the exact same coin.
Don’t believe me?
We are terrified of cancer because it makes us realize how fleeting and precious life is.
We fear for our children because we’ve never known love as deep as the love we harbor as parents.
We mourn a romantic breakup because we remember how beautiful love was before the fracture occurred.
We can’t possibly feel the sting of want without the experience of wanting not.
We can’t possibly know the valley of loss without once standing atop a mountain.
In short, there is no pain in this life that doesn’t point to something beautiful that once was.
Pain is a fossil of beautiful things.
It’s a footprint of something that left us.
And when we experience pain like this, friends, we have two choices:
We can let these ghosts haunt us, or we can turn them into our teachers.
As this is the eve of my bilateral mastectomy, I found my laundry pile tonight. A few months ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of thirty-five. Right now, I am scared to death of the scars this surgery will leave on me, physically and emotionally.
Why did I never appreciate my body when it was healthy? Why did I not relish my feminine shape before it was altered forever by a surgeon’s knife? Why did I feel so shy during intimacy, so embarrassed in a low-cut bathing suit, so ashamed in a formal gown that made me look buxom?
Today, I ache with sadness over the changes my body will experience. But when I wake up, get through this pain, and heal . . . I can make you a promise: I will do better.
This pain I’m experiencing? I know it points to something beautiful, and I will find that beauty again.
I will love my body with abandon, relish my health, and allow myself to feel proud of what’s left of my womanly figure.
My pain will no longer hold me captive.
My pain will become my teacher.
Friends, when you find yourself in the darkest times, remember this: you only know what darkness is because you’ve experienced light.
When you are low, low, low in the valley, let that remind you that you’ve scaled some incredible mountains in your time.
You’ll scale them again.
Run your fingers across the scars on your heart and remember the beautiful things that once existed in each crevice.
Those are what makes life worth living.
Let lost romance remind you that love is worth chasing.
Let your sick body remind you that health is worth celebrating.
Let your broken friendships remind you how deeply you can love and connect with another person.
When you find yourself curled up in the fetal position in a pile of dirty laundry (literally or figuratively, maybe I’m alone here), just remember there is no hurt in your life that doesn’t point to something beautiful.
Find that beauty, remember it, and cling to it like a cat on a curtain.
Beauty is coming for us again, my friends. Our hurts won’t last forever.
All we need is a little grace, a little time.
And perhaps, a pile of laundry.
—
Follow her on Twitter https://twitter.com/MKBackstrom
Find out more about her on her website: https://holyhotmess.com/
BUY THE BOOK HERE
Category: On Writing
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