Rea Frey On Becoming A Writer

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

I ask my daughter this loaded (and wholly unfair) question. She studies me with her missing front tooth. The new one pushes through slick pink gums like a slice of bread easing out of a toaster.

“Happy,” she says.

My mom heart swells while my mom brains worries about money. How will she make a living? How will she learn the hard lessons of life? Should we be homeschooling her so those asshole kids at school don’t warp her precious mind? How long can we maintain this innocence?

“Also,” she says, “a dragon.”

I nod. “Good choice,” I say.

I think back to my own childhood. Much like my daughter, who is rarely without a book in hand, I too clung to literature, journals, and making up stories. My agitated middle finger wore its No.2 lead smudge proudly. When I wasn’t busy hurtling my body through the air in gymnastics, I was tucked in a chair with a book.

Instead of just going all in and following the passions I laid the foundation for over the course of my entire life, I went about it the long way. Yes, I went to school for creative writing, but I quickly transitioned to journalism once I graduated.

I worked various freelance jobs for Chicago publications. I became a journalist on death row for not one, not two, but three cases. I was hired as a ghostwriter in Switzerland. I wrote book proposals, blogs, and press releases. I was a content manager, an editorial director, a book editor, a content creator. I became a published author of four nonfiction books. I wrote poetry and letters in my free time.

Basically, anything that had to do with words, I got my hands on, and yet…

I still wasn’t fulfilled.

For most of our lives, it feels like we circle around the very thing we’re supposed to be doing and never quite land on the vocation when it’s obvious to everyone else. When I look at my daughter, her interests are clearly defined:

• Reading
• Writing
• Eating
• Playing
• Hanging on poles (Oh Lord, help us)

I have always loved stories and those who tell them. So why the hell was I trying to fit my “writing life” into one that revolved around other people’s agendas? Why wasn’t I just sitting down to write my own story?

The answer came hard and swift, as most good answers do. I had not touched fiction in ten long years, when a kernel of an idea began to blossom. I didn’t do much with it, but I knew the crux of the story and the characters’ names. (Hey, it helps.)

In my daily life, I was working three jobs: I co-owned a gym, I was the content manager for a billion-dollar company where I traveled a few times per month, and I was an editor for another magazine. As I was hustling through the airport, I witnessed an exchange between mother and daughter that stopped me in my tracks. I watched the mother shake and scream at her child. I watched the father do nothing. I watched the little girl, clad in a fancy red dress, stare into her mother’s face with something like apathy.

The little girl’s name in my proposed book was Emma. The little girl’s name in the red dress was Emma too.

Was it a sign? Probably. I couldn’t get that little girl out of my head (or her mother). Because I’m an all in kind of person, I immediately went home and gave notice for two of my jobs. I kept the one that was paying the most and gave myself two months to write the book before my corporate contract ended.

I wrote NOT HER DAUGHTER in a month.

From there, I began something new for myself. I decided not to second-guess anything. It didn’t matter that I hadn’t touched fiction. It didn’t matter that it was “hard” to get an agent and even harder to land a book deal. I was getting an agent. I was getting a book deal. Scratch that: I was going to get a movie deal.

I wrote it all down. I said it out loud. I gave myself no plan B, no other option. I really believed that what I was doing was right; that I was changing my life, that I was getting aligned with the life I was always supposed to live.

And then everything started to fall into place.

Luckily, I got the agent. I landed a two-book deal with St. Martin’s Press. The book was optioned for film. Everything I set out to do, I did.

Now my life revolves around words, stories, meeting other authors, and enjoying this incredible community I’m so fortunate to be a part of.

I look at my daughter as she taps me on the shoulder. “Want to see the story I wrote?”

I put down what I’m doing and settle in to listen to her read. She is only six, but her stories are bold, large, and full of detail. I applaud when she’s done, and she squeezes me tight. I inhale her scent as she kisses me on the cheek.

“I’m so proud of you,” she says.

“For what?” I ask.

“For writing your book.”

I swallow the sentiment and kiss her again. “Thank you,” I say, meaning it.

And then I grab her hand and go outside to play.

—

Rea Frey is an award-winning author of four nonfiction books. She lives in Nashville with her husband and daughter. NOT HER DAUGHTER is her debut novel 

Find out more about Rea on her website https://reafrey.com/

About NOT HER DAUGHTER

SOON TO BE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE

PopSugar – The Summer’s Hottest Books * Refinery 29 – Best Summer Thrillers * Parade – 20 Chilling Thrillers by Women to Read This Year * Brit + Co – 15 New Thrillers by Women That Will Give You Chills This Summer * The Zoe Report – 20 Books to Read this Summer * She Reads – New Summer Thrillers to Get Your Heart Racing * Working Mother – 15 Hot New Summer Beach Reads

 

“Brings to mind Jodi Picoult…thought-provoking domestic drama.” – Booklist

“Will make you miss your bedtime, guaranteed.” – Bestselling author Kimberly Belle

Gripping, emotional, and wire-taut, Not Her Daughter raises the question of what it means to be a mother—and how far someone will go to keep a child safe.

Emma Townsend. Five years old. Gray eyes, brown hair. Missing since June.

Emma is lonely. Living with her cruel mother and clueless father, Emma retreats into her own world of quiet and solitude.

Sarah Walker. Successful entrepreneur. Broken-hearted. Kidnapper.

Sarah has never seen a girl so precious as the gray-eyed child in a crowded airport terminal. When a second-chance encounter with Emma presents itself, Sarah takes her—far away from home. But if it’s to rescue a little girl from her damaging mother, is kidnapping wrong?

Amy Townsend. Unhappy wife. Unfit mother. Unsure whether she wants her daughter back.

Amy’s life is a string of disappointments, but her biggest issue is her inability to connect with her daughter. And now Emma is gone without a trace.

As Sarah and Emma avoid the nationwide hunt, they form an unshakeable bond. But what about Emma’s real mother, back at home?

Praise for Not Her Daughter

“The plot twists here are brave, the themes are both poignant and unsettling, and the resolution is deeply resonant. A page-turner with heart!” – New York Times bestselling author Kate Moretti

“A cleverly constructed novel that will have you questioning everything you believe about right or wrong.” – New York Times bestselling author Chevy Stevens

“Engrossing and suspenseful, Frey writes her characters with depth and compassion, challenging readers to question their own code of ethics.” – Zoje Stage, author of Baby Teeth

“An emotional ride where the line between right and wrong begins to fade…pulls you in from the very first page, and unlike most in its genre, you won’t know how you want it to end until it does.” – Wendy Walker, author of Emma in the Night

 

 

 

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Category: Contemporary Women Writers, How To and Tips