When the Story Hurts too Much: Fakhra Younas’ Life and Memoir
When a woman tells her story, writes her memoir, she is writing her own history. She becomes visible to history; part of the human narrative. Telling her truth, her experience and wisdom, she leaves her legacy.
When the life lived hurts too much… it’s hard to write, and hard to tell. And when the story told hurts too much, it’s hard to read and hard to share.
Hard too, not to share.
Fakhra Younas’ story is one of those memoirs. Her life was one of those lives. And we must share it.
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Warning. If you are not yet aware of her story and are sensitive to violence against women, please think twice before clicking on any of the links because they mostly have photos that are excruciating to look at.
Note on Name Spellings: The Italian memoir and Italian articles spell her name with an “as”: Fakhra Younas. The Washington Post and related articles have used “us” at the end, and no “o”: Fakhra Yunus; Huffington Post: Fakhra Younus; also seen, her first name spelled as Fakhira.
~~~
On March 17, 2012 in Rome, Italy, a Pakistani mother, ended her own life, after 12 years that none of us could imagine or endure. Fakhra Younas was in her early 30s, has one son, and one memoir, Il Volto Cancellato, written with Elena Doni.
While it is her death that brought her life to my attention, it is her life that has left me in a state of shock. Her story is very hard to know about. Yet we need to know, as we are able to, so it can inform our lives, our focus, our voices, our writing. We need to know, because what happened to her happens to thousands of women. And the threat of it threatens any one of us.
~~~
Fakhra Younas’ story is of a woman born in a lower class in India, who lived in the red-light district in Karachi, was taught to dance for customers and in time perform in other ways. The daughter of a heroin addict, one account says, she helped support the family. A meeting of a well-to-do man from a powerful political family, Bilal Khar, led to marriage. The chance to leave her difficult life and marry into a prominent family must have held such hope. Perhaps the Pretty in Pink story that was such a hit in the movies in the US is a pop culture parallel. But there the resemblance ends.
As we’ve read about first hand from Tehmina Durrani, author of My Feudal Lord, violence against woman knows no class; being wealthy or prominent gives you no more protection from being hurt than being poor.
Durrani had been married into the powerful political family in Pakistan, to Gulam Mustafa Khar, an important politician in the Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto government, later, Chief Minister of Punjab. [See Jazbah Magazine article.] Her telling her story, writing her history in memoir, cost her a lot.
Fakhra Younas married Gulam Mustafa Khar’s son by a first wife, Bilal Khar, which made the author Tehmina Durrani, Fakhra’s step mother-in-law.
The story is painfully well-told in this Time Magazine article The Evil that Men Do by Hannah Bloch, August 20, 2001. Fakhra tells how it was three years of violence in her martial home. She leaves her husband, returning to her mother in Karachi, and one horrible day in May, her husband awakens her from a nap calling her name, and in an act of horrific cruelty, pours acid on her. If you have the courage to read The Evil that Men Do, and see the pictures, you will never forget what a powerful threat the threat of an acid attack is.
Hannah Bloch explains: “Acid, nitric or hydrochloric, has long been the weapon of retribution for Pakistani men against disloyal, disobedient or overly determined women. One reason is that acid is cheap and readily available.” (Pakistan and a number of other countries as well. See Wikipedia.)
There is much more to the story than told here. Some period after the acid attack, Fakhra secretly asks Tehmina Durrani for help and Tehmina takes Fakhra in. Tehmina is able to make arrangements for Fakhra to start a new life in Italy, where Fakhra would receive help and support from the Italian Government, and in time other groups. Tehmina Durrani tells the story in her article The Life and Death of an Acid Victim in The International News on March 24, 2012, and specifically names organizations and people who helped.
~~~
Elena Doni, an Italian writer, worked with Fakhra on her memoir, and it was published in Italian as Il Volto Cancellato in about 2005, and reportedly translated into Spanish, Le visage efface in French and, Das ausgeloschte Gesicht in German. I have not discovered it available in English yet.
Who will step up to translate Il Volto Cancellato by Fakhra Younas for the English speaking public, or to make it available?
Fakhra Younas had a courage few of us might have to dare to live after the violence against her left her without a face to comfortably show in public. Who knows what degree of pain she had to endure in her skin, and what further pain in her spirit. The devastation of jealousy.
Let us remember Fakhra Younas’ name and her courage and use our writing to raise visibility, and put pressure on the governments and people of countries that perpetuate crimes against women. Hard as it is in America, to have definitive proof of those who commit violence against women that leads to conviction, it is harder still in countries where women are not considered equal to men.
Vote with your reading and writing and commenting power. Ask that her book be translated into English. Let others know in your own voice and your own way, that though we may be living without fear or threat of harm, many are not free in their own homes.
~~~
When a woman tells her story, writes her memoir, she becomes an author. In writing her own history, she becomes visible to history, part of the human narrative. She tells her truth, shares her experience and wisdom. She leaves a written legacy.
When the life lived hurts too much… it’s hard to write, and hard to tell.
And when the story told hurts too much, it’s hard to read and hard to share.
Hard too, not to share.
Fakhra Younas’ story is one of those memoirs. Her life was one of those lives.
We must remember her. Let us remember her name for all the women who suffer this cruelty.
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I will be looking for news of actions that result from the world’s notice of Fakhra’s life and death, that may help reduce and stop future attacks.
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We owe a debt of gratitude to all the courageous women writers who have pulled their lives away from tending to others and chores to prepare their own histories, their memoirs. And we further owe a debt of gratitude to those who work with women to coach, type, edit and publish their memoirs.
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News and Blog Reports about Fakhra Younas in English and Italian
Updated 3/29/2012 at 12:00 pm EST US. See comments for further updates.
LeNews.eu, The Terrible Story…, liked 143 times for FB, and read 2,773 times on their site as of 3/27/2012 10:41 AM EST
An Italian Interview on Dreamsworld.it
Newsline (Pakistan) – A Burning Issue by Maheen Bashir Adamjee 3/18/2012 In depth story.
ABC News article by @MichaelaConley on 3/27/2012. The roughest picture up top. Adds more context to the field of plastic surgery for acid attack survivors.
Huffington Post weighs in on 3/28/2012. With 1700+FB shres, 51 tweets, 7 Google+, 222 emails and 1200 comments. Extraordinary response. Photos of the funeral and protest by Pakistani women.
Alessandra Boga on il legno storto – Un pensiero per Fakhra Younas (IT) Includes devastating details about Fakhra’s last day, more specifics than so far any other accounts have had. In Italian.
Elisa Carriero (IT)
Caterina Balivo (IT)
The International News, Shunned in Life, Embraced in Death, by Saher Baloch, 3/26, 2012
ENewsPaper- Pakistani people to answer – Roberto Franceschinis Consul of Italy in Karachi
Lettera43.it – Roma, morta suicida la scrittrice Fakhra Younas (187 FB likes, and 37 Tweets as of 3/27/2012 11:07 AM EST)
Reuters Pakistam – The Woman Who Died Twice
The Washington Post Blog – Pakistan acid victim Fakhra Yunus commits suicide
by Elizabeth Flock
Wikipedia on Il Volto Cancellato
Telenova Giornale: La storia di Fakhra, vittima della violenza di genere 3/27/3012
Pakistan Today – Feudal curse and brutality 3/28/2012
Burn Victims of Pakistan on Huffington Post by Shama Junejo 3/28/2012
SEARCH:
Twitter’s Search on Fakhra includes tweets, twitter accounts, images and videos, from around the world.
YouTube Search on Fakhra includes English and other language TV reports.
See more updates in the comments.
French edition of Fahkra's memoir
German edition of Fakhra's memoir
Category: Pakistani Women Writers, Women Writing Memoirs
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I am from India, and I know what goes on in that part of Asia. There are a few books written by a few women who have been tortured. Most of the husbands would love to control their wives, and verbal abuse is their strong weapon,saying,” Woman is for feeding and Breeding.” Money, education, power, independence, country, race, language and religion have no bars. The society does not know and friends do not interfere–they are not friends anyway. This disease is multi-factorial and sadly,it has deep roots for generations. Things are changing with a slow pace, as women get educated, develop free spirit,and become self-sufficient.
I hope we get to read the long-awaited book about Fakhra’s story.
Smita, Thank you very much for your comment here. It sounds like you are very informed about the situation. As I read everything I can on the topic, I realize nothing short of an ongoing national campaign to reshape the culture, like I’ve seen in Taiwan and China to support male-female equality, and 1 child only in China, and 2 only (back in the late 1970s) for Taiwan. Big signs. TV ads. Radio spots. That’s just what I noticed, probably there were shows and articles and interviews all in support of it too.
Mondadori is looking for an English publisher for Il volto cancellato. We will be publishing a blog post by Fakhra’s co-author, Elena Doni shortly. She’s prepared to write an update if an English language publisher steps up. – Anora McGaha, Editor
Hello, Fakhra’s story is one that should be available in the English-speaking world. As I am proficient in Italian I would like to offer to work on the translation; does anybody know how I can get in contact with the publishers?
Brittany Cooper
Thank you for your reply and interest. I’ll send you an email with more information. – Anora
News stories continue to get published, keeping Fakhra Younas’ (Fakhra Younus, Fakhra Yunus)memory fresh. Outrage continues.
This 4/16/2012, almost one month after her death.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/obituaries/9207608/Fakhra-Younus.html
April 9 – 10, 2012 The story is reported in the New York Times
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/10/world/asia/hope-in-pakistan-for-curbing-acid-attacks.html?ref=declanwalsh
By Declan Walsh, with contributions by Gaia Pianigiani and Elisabetta Povoledo from Rome, Italy.
I am truly staggered that this book is not available in English. I hope it happens soon; this story needs to be told.
Gill, Thank you for weighing in. The company that published Il Volto Cancellato is Mondadori. Their Twitter handle is @librimondadori. If you feel inspired, send a tweet to them, or simply one saying what you said here with the hashtag #Fakhra. I’ve written to the PR person at Mondadori inquiring this, but so far no response. – Anora
The most important stories about Fakhra Younas, also spelled Fakhra Yunus or Fakhra Younus.
Hannah Block: Time Magazine 8/20/2001 The Evil That Men Do
Fakhra Younas: Il Volto Cancellato published by Mondadori in 2005 Fakhra’s own memoir written with Elena Doni.
2006 Italian Interview on ManidiStrega
http://www.manidistrega.it/tx/consigli_parliamodi.asp?id=304
Tehmina Durrani: The International News 3/24/2012 – The Life and Death of an Acid Victim Tehmina Durrani was related to Fakhra by marriage, and by personal experience with domestic violence and abuse. She helped Fakhra get out of Pakistan and start a new life in Italy. Her piece also lists organizations and individuals who loved and cared for Fakhra and her son.
Sana Saleem: Dawn.com 3/26/2012 Justice after Fakhra
Myra MacDonald: Reuters – The woman who died twice, Pakistan and acid attacks, 3/26/3012
Cosima Ungaro: Huffington Post UK 3/30/2012 12:22 Fakhra Younas: A Profile of the Acid Attack Victim Whose Story Touched the World
Sebastian Abbott: AP on Huffington Post US 3/29/2012 05:54 PM ET – perhaps the most translated and circulated Fakhra Younus Dead: Pakistani Acid Victim Commits Suicide
Mikaela Conley: ABC News 3/28/2012 – Acid Attack Victim Fakhra Yunus Commits Suicide
Barbara Schiavulli: Il Fatto Quotidiano.it 3/23/2012 (120 comments) Fakhra, uomini di latta
Alessandra Boga: il legno storto 3/28/2012 – Un pensiero per Fakhra Younas (IT)
Saroop Ijaz: The Tribune Express: Burning Face 4/1/2012 Very moving piece asking important questions.
Major Networks Reporting on Fakhra Yunus (Fakhra Younus, Fakhra Younas)
Fox News 3/28/2012
ABC News – Acid Attack Victim Fakhra Yunus Commits Suicide – by Mikaela Conley, 3/28/2012
IBN Live – Most famous ‘face’ of Pakistani acid attacks kills self – Press Trust of India on 3/26/2012 6:15PM IST
New Links Hitting Twitter on March 30th:
Malay language
Cina Islam by Drs. Khalil Idham Lim 3:30 PM
MyInfo101.com 3/30/2012 11:30AM
Netherlands in Dutch
Nujij.nl linking to skijpsche.ericoonline.nl 3/301/2012
Columbia South America
El Pais, 3/30/2012
Norway
Aftenposten.no – Syreoffers selvmord vekker harme, by Kristin Solberg, 3/30/2012 08:45/11:16
Indonesia
The Female Kompas.com article of 3/29/2012 in Indonesia continues to get Twitter retweets.
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International
International Business Times (UK) 3/30/2012 2:50AM EDT
Yahoo! Noticias en Espanol translation of Sebastian Abbot’s AP story
Christian Post – 3/28/2012 1:35pm
Causes.com – I am Saying No to Abuse – no date
Blog Posts
3/30/2012
Liberal Fascist – Watching Saving Face
3/29/2012
On MUFTAH, a Middle Eastern Site: Remembering Fakhra Yunus by Ayesha Chugh (It starts saying yesterday, referring to the day Fakhra ended her life, which really was 3/17/2012)
Perez Hilton.com So Sad! Acid Attack Victim Commits Suicide, 3/29/2012 4:40pm
3/28/2012
Fakhra Younas: La Persecuzione delle Donne Nel Mondo Quotes from Il Volto Cancellato. WARNING: many very disturbing pictures about violence against women.
Twitter Hashtags
#JusticeforFakhra March 25 – 26
#Fakhra Ongoing, through March 30 still.
Canada
Huffington Post by Sara C. Nelson 3/29/2012 12:43
The Tribune Express, with the International Herald Tribune
3/29/2012
Bury Her Standing by Amber Darr – Clear strong story line.
http://tribune.com.pk/story/357036/bury-her-standing/
Italian Television piece from 3/23/2012
Warning – very painful images of women’s faces damaged by acid attacks
news.centrodiascolto.it
http://news.centrodiascolto.it/video/tg4/2012-03-23/questioni-sociali/il-suicidio-di-fakhra-younas-la-donna-pakistana-che-nel-2011-
3/29/2012 Twitter feed with and without hashtag for Fakhra, starts to show Spanish and other roman lettered language tweets, harder to identify which country.
From @kpwanity – a news feed about women Indonesia 3/29/2012 15:49 WIB
Portugal
DN Globo (post date unclear)
Sweden
In Expressen.se on 3/28/2012 17:07
Turkey
Manset HABER 3/29/2012 12:29
Greece
e-gossiproom – 12:13 (no clear date)
Italy
Vanity Fair.it 3/23/2012
Malawi
Malawi Voice
Finally an image with a sign saying: “Stop Open Sale of Acid” on Press Trust of India.
http://ibnlive.in.com/news/most-famous-face-of-pak-acid-attacks-kills-self/242875-56.html
The Middle East
Egypt – no sign as of 3/28 11pm.
Gulf News 3/25 19:23 pm
Picture of cheap acid in plastic bottles available for less than a US dollar.
“Acid attack victim commits suicide after justice system fails her.”
http://gulfnews.com/news/world/pakistan/acid-attack-victim-commits-suicide-after-justice-system-fails-her-1.999596
Making the connection with domestic violence:
“Survivor of grave domestic violence commits suicide”
3/28/2012 20:52 http://www.b92.net
http://www.b92.net/eng/news/world-article.php?yyyy=2012&mm=03&dd=28&nav_id=79496
“The suicide has once again triggered a severe reaction internationally.”
US Los Angeles Times
by Emily Alpert 3/28/2012 4:26 PM
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/world_now/2012/03/acid-attack-survivor-pakistan-photo.html
For a lengthy list of news stories in English, check news.google.com.
Australia
Newsday – Sebastian Abbot’s AP piece 3/28/2012 9:23 PM
The Daily Telegraph Acid victim Fakhra Younus’ suicide shames all Pakistan Chris Parsons, 3/30/2012 12:00 AM
New Zealand
3News – Sebastiann Abbot’s AP story 3/29/2012 2:43 PM
http://www.3news.co.nz/Prominent-Pakistani-acid-victim-Fakhra-Younus-commits-suicide/tabid/417/articleID/248543/Default.aspx
Includes a photo of her before May 2000 not seen elsewhere, except LA Times 3/28 piece.
The Real Steve Gray 3/29/3012
http://www.therealstevegray.com/2012/03/pakistani-fakhra-younus-commits-suicide-12-yrs-after-acid-attack/
MSN NZ 3/29/2012 10:38
http://news.msn.co.nz/worldnews/8443220/acid-attack-victim-commits-suicide
Brazil
Operamundi 3/28/2012 13.15
Vítima de ataque com ácido se suicida e levanta polêmica no Paquistão
Noticias Bol 3/28/2012
Germany
Baisler Zaitung 3/28/2012
http://bazonline.ch/panorama/vermischtes/Die-Frau-die-zweimal-starb/story/30221479
Fakhra Younas’ book in German
http://www.buecher.de/shop/buecher/das-ausgeloeschte-gesicht/younas-fakhra-doni-elena/products_products/detail/prod_id/23817271/
Spanish News
La Patilla 3/25/2012
Mujer quemada con ácido por su esposo se suicidó ante injusticia de la ley
http://www.lapatilla.com/site/2012/03/25/mujer-quemada-con-acido-por-su-esposo-se-suicido-ante-injusticia-de-la-ley-foto/
Chinese news.
Oriental Daily 3/29/2012
http://orientaldaily.on.cc/cnt/china_world/20120329/00180_008.html
Pre-2012 Stories about Fakhra Yunus (Fakhra Younus, Fakhra Younas)
2010
Corrosion about Le Visage Efface on Blogs Humanites by Murielle Samba 2/1/2010
2007
Intervista a Younas Fakhra: maledetta gelosia by Emmanuele on http://www.dreamsworld.it 3/19/2012
Nouvelles de France Posted 3/29./2012 1:18
http://www.ndf.fr/nouvelles-deurope/28-03-2012/elle-se-suicide-douze-ans-apres-une-attaque-a-lacide#.T3OqmzEgfgc
The Telegraph (UK) story by Dean Nelson posted 3/27/2012 at 3:42 pm BST
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/pakistan/9169352/Pakistan-acid-attack-victim-commits-suicide.html
India Today updated their post on 3/27/2012 at 11:31 IST
http://indiatoday.intoday.in/story/pakistan-acid-victim-fakhra-yunus-commits-suicide-italy/1/179549.html
A related post on 3/12/2012 talks about treating acid attacks as seriously as rapes.
http://indiatoday.intoday.in/story/treat-acid-attack-as-seriously-as-rape/1/177398.html
” ‘This crime ruins a victim’s life completely…’ Tirath [The Women and Child Development minister] said.
Her ministry was also keen on curbing over-the-counter sale of concentrated acid in the market.”
Key Articles:
Time Magazine article by @realhannahbloch in August 20, 2001 Time Magazine
The Woman who died twice; Pakistan and acid attacks by @myraemacdonald
3/26/2012 on Reuters
http://blogs.reuters.com/pakistan/2012/03/26/the-woman-who-died-twice-pakistan-and-acid-attacks/
Tehmina Durrani article in the International News 3/24/2012
http://www.thenews.com.pk/Todays-News-2-99279-The-life-and-death-of-an-acid-victim
Huffington Post article by Sebastian Abbot (AP) shows the tremendous interest in Fakhra Younas. 3/28/12 5:54 pm http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/28/fakhra-younus-dead-pakistan-acid_n_1384612.html
2,034 FB Shares
54 Tweets
10 Google +
270 Emails
1,742 Comments
Global Post story by Amy Silverstein, posted 3/28/2012 at 11:54. Well written, well documented with the sources of her information.
http://www.globalpost.com/dispatch/news/regions/middle-east/120328/acid-attack-victim-fakhra-younus-commits-suicide
Italy’s Telenova Ragusa posted La storia di Fakhra, vittima della violenza di genere 3/27/2012 7:16
http://www.telenovaragusa.com/?p=10144
Quoted from the article:
“Questa donna coraggio, divenuta paladina dei diritti femminili, autrice del libro “Il volto cancellato” che ha venduto milioni di copie, per anni è stata il simbolo della lotta contro la violenza di genere. In occasione di quella sua visita in terra iblea alla domanda: “Come è possibile che ancora oggi in Pakistan possa accadere che un uomo che acidifica una donna resti impunito?”, Fakhra rispose: “Qui in Italia non vi gettano l’acido, ma vi ammazzano direttamente. Forse voi italiane non ve ne siete ancora rese conto, ma lo stalking, la persecuzione sono violenze psicologiche altrettanto terribili, che poi nei casi più gravi culminano nell’omicidio”.
Translated loosely:
This courageous woman, who became a _______ for women’s rights, author of the book, The Erased Face” which sold millions of copies, for years was the symbol of the battle against the violence against the sexes.
When she visited ________, to the question, “How is it possible that even today, in Pakistan, a man can attack a woman with acid with impunity?”, Fakhra answered:
“Here in Italy they don’t throw acid on you, they just kill you. Maybe you Italians are not yet aware but stalking and persecution are [a form of] psychological violence as terrible, that in the worst cases end in homicide.”
Care2.com posted has a story by Kristina Chew posted 3/28/2012 at 7:12 AM
http://www.care2.com/causes/acid-victim-fakhra-younus-takes-her-own-life.html
MSNBC Posts the AP story by Sebastian Abbot at 7pm EST.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/46876677/ns/world_news-south_and_central_asia/#.T3OhqTEgfgc
The UK Daily Mail has just published Fakhra’s story. 3/28/2012 6:12 EST. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2121536/Former-Pakistani-dancing-girl-commits-suicide-12-years-horrific-acid-attack-left-looking-human.html
She was an amazing young women. I am surprised her book is not available in English.. Perhaps we can translate it into Englsh and the money can be used to start organization in her name for acid attack victims. This is the only thing we can do for her now. looking forward to hearing back from you…
Saadia, thank you for commenting. I’m researching and waiting to see what might emerge about a translation of Il Volto Cancellato into English, and also a documentary. An organization in her name would be a way to honor her in perpetuity. I know there are organizations that help acid attack victims. If you find any discussion about a translation or documentary, or ways people will honor her life, please comment back.
I fully agree with you Saadia A. Arlanturk. This is such a powerful story and it is hard to think how many more stories exist just like this. Something needs to be done. I was searching for a book on Fakhra Younas and am now very sorry to hear that it is not in English. I think everyone needs to know what is happening to these women. I know that there is a documentary out there and I know it just received an Oscar, but I could not find any links for it.
Nicole, Thank you for your comment. Here’s the film link.
http://savingfacefilm.com/