What Happens Next? By Sarah (S.E.) Reichert

April 20, 2024 | By | Reply More

What Happens Next?

by Sarah (S.E.) Reichert

When asked how my last year had gone, I had to pause and think about it. I’d accomplished strange and long-awaited things. So much had been packed in, that I could scarcely separate the months.

“It was a whirlwind,” I said. “I’m not exactly sure what happened, but something did.” 

It even took me a while to write this blog about it. I had the hardest time pinpointing what exactly it was about last year made me feel like I’ve landed on the doorway to 2024, disillusioned and empty. Then my subconscious mind, doodled this question on my crossword:

What happens when that goal you’ve been working towards for decades gets reached? 

After nearly 20 years of writing, in a single year, I published 5 novels with 5 Prince Publishing. I’m still in awe of handling all of the extra work, added stresses, and compromises that led to being a published (now traditionally and independently) author. 

But, what do I do with myself now?

It’s, laughably, a real issue. When your purpose for so long gets realized, what happens to the day-to-day struggle you’ve been used to?

The simple answer is “keep writing.” Obviously, I’m a writer, right? I’ve spent the last two decades just writing, because I love it. Because I have stories to tell. Because I believe in my characters and want to be witness to their struggles and change. That’s why I write. 

But in that creative process, I got used to the idea of rejection, of not getting published, of not being known by anyone. There was freedom to create and do what I wanted in that. So to have a year, where not only was I producing books with a publisher and working extra hard to polish them, I was also out in the world talking about them, selling them, and comparing them to others’. I felt like a gyroscope knocked off its center. 

Publication shifts focus to selling, which is just the way of the world, and I’m not complaining. But I’m not an entrepreneur. I’m a writer. And it made me question so much about my process, and my abilities, and my purpose. Did this mean I was a competitor? Did this mean I had to start worrying about numbers and followers? I was so caught up in the business of writing, that I stopped writing. It was a strange shift, from creativity to consumerism. I know this is the reality for a lot of writers, and I think that some of them balance it wonderfully. I did not.

I worked so hard on my books, labors of love every one of them, to have the world start yelling that it wasn’t quite enough. You wrote a book, NOW you need to sell it. Books are marketable. Authors should be marketable. So began the shift in my psyche from creation to marketing. From inspiration to hustle… And the goal I had to write, became a different kind of goal. To show the world that my creative work is worthy—because now it has a price. And a book that was beloved and worth unmeasurable joy became a statistic based on what the world was willing to pay for it and how much attention it got.

But it doesn’t really matter, right? Because the point is that the goal, the end game, is a book in the hands of readers. And I do find contentment in that. But the world isn’t content with contentment. We need to do more (posts, reels, campaigns), have more (followers, content, ads, next book?) Be more (assertive, aggressive, successful, marketable.) Where was I? 

Exactly the right question.

Where was I? I got lost. I know the process, start to finish. From the random idea, to the churning out scenes, to the long process of editing, and rewriting, critique partners, querying, contracts, more edits, covers and promos, book launches and marketing. I’ve been through the whole of it now, from multiple angles. But there’s a sad and strange part of me that fears I’ve forgotten how (or why) to go back to the beginning. 

Can I ever really go back? 

Where the joy was? Where the love was? Or will the end goals of marketability always be the undercurrent to my creativity? Even though I’m so grateful for what I’ve earned and have been helped with on my journey to publication, I’m in a personal struggle between my passion and the expectations of those in the business. 

I didn’t realize at the time, but the journey up to the summit was the most beautiful part. The view from the top is beautiful, but the summit itself didn’t make me a better person or give me more empathy. It didn’t make me a better writer or a more expansive thinker. It just opened windows so the rest of the world could look in.

So, what’s next? Well, right now, I’m struggling towards grace. For myself. For my process. I am struggling against expectations and comparisons. I am reminding myself the joy is in the work. And that without the love of my art, the joy in writing…no other summits can be reached. And for me, it was never about the summit anyway. It’s in the writing journey, where I really grow, change, gain, learn, and become. The summit is a view, the journey is the purpose. 

Sarah Reichert (S.E. Reichert) is a writer, novelist, poet and blogger. She is the author of The Sweet Valley Series (Raising Elle, Granting Katelyn, and Composing Laney) and two 80s themed sweet romances (Rewriting Christmas, Back to the 80s) from 5 Prince Publishing and three other well-received novels. Reichert is the Youth Coordinator of the Writing Heights Writers Association. Her work has been featured in The Fort Collins Coloradoan, Haunted Waters Press, “Sunrise Summits: A Poetry Anthology”, “Rise: An Anthology of Change”, Poetry Ireland Review, and “We Are The West: A Colorado Anthology”. She also had a 5-part audio cast produced from her sci-fi adventure novella, “Saturn Rising”. Reichert lives in Fort Collins with her family. In her non-writing hours, she is a mother to two teenage girls, loves being outdoors, and is a 2nd degree Black Belt in Kenpo Karate JuJitsu.

https://sarahreichertauthor.com

RAISING ELLE

From the author of the Southtown Harbor series and two poetry anthologies comes a powerful story of healing and the power of love. In Raising Elle, the first installment in a three-part series, Elle Sullivan comes back to her hometown, Sweet Valley, Wyoming, bruised to hell and hiding a big secret. Determined to start her life over, she embarks on a journey to take back her power and help her family save their small horse ranch. But running into her old high school sweetheart, Blake O’Connor, reminds her that no road to success is easy. Raising Elle is a journey through hardships and forgiveness, and all the ways love heals even the deepest wounds.

BUY HERE

 

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Category: On Writing

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