My Writing Process – A Very Personal Story

July 23, 2018 | By | 4 Replies More

My new book – Forgive Me Not – is published by Canelo on 23rd July 2018. It heralds a change of direction. Before that HarperCollins published nine of my romantic comedies.

It is a story about forgiveness and loss. About addiction and friendship. And it was inspired by a very personal journey I have just been on.

In August 2016 I found myself sitting in an addiction clinic wondering how I had got there. My drinking had grown from the weekends to every day of the week – although the problems started years ago when I suffered from anorexia and bulimia. The mental issues behind alcoholism and eating disorders can, as in my case, be very similar.

Rehabilitation involved acknowledging and accepting responsibility for mistakes I might have made… for people I might have hurt. It got me thinking about forgiveness and how people cope if they can’t give or receive it. I did a lot of research online and came across many painful stories.  An idea for a novel started to take shape about someone trying to make amends. However at this point I realised I just couldn’t write it as a romantic comedy or lighthearted book. My heart wasn’t in it. The spark needed to write funny lines and create humorous plots had gone. I guess this shouldn’t have been a surprise, but it was. It made me realise how closely my writing process is linked to my own emotions.

So I started writing the story of an addict who did terrible things but eventually returned to her home town to make amends. There were no jokes. No comedic characters. It took a lot of hard work to put sentences together in my new style. However my sentiments flew onto the page. All the details of what I’d gone through in recovery – the feelings. The practical treatments.  With exhilaration I sent the finished manuscript off to my agent. Patiently I waited for feedback.

But when I eventually heard back, I was in for a shock. For the first time in my writing career I was faced with starting again, virtually from scratch. You see, I hadn’t maintained authorial distance. The book had effectively become too much about me. My agent said it was like a guide to getting sober – but where was the actual story?

I thought about her words for a couple of days. I contemplated giving up and starting another project. But then I realised she was completely right and cringe now at the original version I sent her. The more I thought, the more the characters and plot started to sing to me. Excitedly I expanded both and began writing the book again. And I found my signature warmth evolved in the story, so it organically drew on previous aspects of my writing.

This time I was very aware that the protagonist’s story was not mine. And the hardest part of this meant murdering many darlings – mainly chapters I’d written about my time in addiction services. I began to see that they were self-indulgent. Cathartic, yes, but of no real importance to the plot. But looking back, I needed to write them to get them out of my system before I could really let my creative juices do their work.

So, I suppose what I’ve learnt is that if you are going to write a novel based on something you feel passionate about or have experienced, be prepared to take a long hard look at that first draft. Be very aware of keeping an authorial distance and seeing your characters as individual people and not reflections of yourself. Otherwise there’s a risk the story will become uninteresting and self-absorbed.

I’ve also learnt – if I didn’t realise before – that for me an agent’s objective view is a crucial part of the writing process!

Samantha Tonge’s passion, second to spending time with her husband and children, is writing. She has travelled widely. When not writing she passes her days cycling, baking and drinking coffee. Her bestselling debut novel, Doubting Abbey, was shortlisted for the Festival of Romantic Fiction best Ebook award. Her novel Game of Scones won the Love Stories Awards Best Romantic Ebook category. She lives in Manchester and Forgive Me Not is her first novel with Canelo.

Find out more about Sam on her website http://samanthatonge.co.uk/

Follow her on Twitter https://twitter.com/SamTongeWriter

About FORGIVE ME NOT

Forgiveness can be hard to come by… An unputdownable new novel from bestseller Samantha Tonge
How far would you go to make amends?

When Emma fled her home at Foxglove Farm, she’d let down and hurt those who cared for her most. But now, two years later, she’s ready to face up to her past; she’s ready to go back.

But Emma’s unannounced return causes more problems than she could have foreseen. The people she knew and loved aren’t ready to forget, let alone forgive. And the one person she wants to reconnect with the most, her mother, can’t remember who she is.

Just as Emma starts to rebuild trust, an uncovered family secret and a shocking past crime threaten her newly forged future…

Sometimes simply saying sorry isn’t enough.

Perfect for readers of Ruth Hogan or Amanda Prowse, this is an extraordinary and unforgettable novel about running away from yourself – and finding a way back.

‘A compelling read, utterly unputdownable; prepare to have your heartstrings pulled and your perceptions challenged.’ Fiona Collins, author of The Sister Swap

‘Forgive Me Not is a brave and beautiful book that tackles difficult themes with grace and compassion. It portrays the cruelty and fallibility of human nature against the backdrop of the powerful dual forces of forgiveness and hope, to tell a story that will stay with me for some time. Highly recommended.’ Rachel Burton, author of The Many Colours of Us

‘Samantha Tonge has created something unique and magical in Forgive Me Not. It’s a one-of-a-kind read!’ Laurie Ellingham, author of One Endless Summer

‘A poignant, bittersweet story of finding forgiveness in the hardest of places—home.’ Kate Hewitt, author of A Mother’s Goodbye

‘A touching, poignant read with real heart about the choices we make, the second chances we hope for and the power of forgiveness’ – Annie Lyons, author of The Happiness List

‘Both touching and thought-provoking with its real-life issues. Emma’s story – especially her experiences of rough sleeping – will stay with me for a long time’ – Jennifer Joyce, author of The Bed and Breakfast by the Sea

‘Easily one of the best books I’ve read this year’ Rachel’s Random Reads

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Category: On Writing

Comments (4)

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  1. Thank you for sharing so honestly in this piece, Samantha. Your experience is a good lesson that no matter how much we hone our craft and perfect (if that’s possible) our skills, there is still room to grow.

    • Samantha says:

      Hello Karen – thanks for reading. Yes, I think complacency is a very dangerous thing when it comes to writing, readers will pick up on it. If we ever feel we’ve perfected our craft, then it’s time to stir things up a little!

  2. I have bought your book today but just curious as to why you couldn’t have written it as a memoir? I am debating the issue of writing a fictionalised memoir and how it would work – how I would feel about it – any thoughts would be welcome. Thank you.

    • Samantha says:

      Hello Angelena,
      Thank you for buying!
      What exactly do you mean by a fictionalised memoir? To me a memoir is more like an autobiographical account. My specific story would not have been as commercial in the sense I wouldn’t have had a full cast of varied characters, the setting would not have been on a farm… I’ve included drug abuse and homelessness – neither were part of my specific journey… I don’t think an account of my own experience would have made for such an interesting read as it would have been much more narrow…
      Does that help? Good luck with your project.
      Sam

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