Bring Everyone In With You: A Strategy For Those Days When You Feel Like You’re Not

by Rachel Stone

Most days, I’m am author. The odd day, like today, I’m a speaker who tells people how I came to be an author in hopes of inspiring them to make space for their passions.

But lately, I’ve felt unjustified in calling myself either.

My current manuscript has me totally stuck. My last speaking engagement was, for tangential reasons I promise you can’t even come close to guessing, an unmitigated disaster (but that’s a story for another post, if not an SNL skit).

All in all, I’ve been in one of those I suck at all of this, there’s no future in any of this slumps that I know is temporary, yet worry nonetheless might be permanent.

Several weeks ago, pre-slump, I was invited to give a talk this morning for a large (by my standards) group. Someone from a previous talk recommended me; I didn’t know whom. I was unfamiliar with the organizer, the attendees, the venue, the vibe. I wouldn’t know a single person there.

And so, as today drew closer, I kinda really…did not want to go anymore?

(To be clear, I was never for one second not going. A quitter I am not.)

Still, I haven’t felt this bottom-of-my-game since crossing the 150 rejection mark with my first book. I’m supposed to tell a roomful of strangers to dream big, defy odds, take a chance on themselves while my inner voice is shouting I’m out of practice, underprepared, hardly qualified! Nothing of value to add! I’m doubtful I’ve framed my message appropriately, or that anyone in the room will connect with it.

And then, behold, the algorithm. I happen upon this exquisite clip in which Maya Angelou explains how to show love to oneself when embarking on a challenge (around 11:55): by summoning everyone—dead or alive, near or far—who has shown you love and kindness, and bring them into that room with you.

This morning, alone and applying makeup, I make like Maya and try it.

One by one, I summon my people. All who have shown me love and kindness along this journey. Grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins in Heaven. Family, chosen family, and writing sisters here on earth. Come on guys, come for a ride with me. Let’s go do a talk.

Moments later, I’m driving an empty car that is full to bursting. I’ve got my hype songs on repeat at full volume (if you don’t already have yours, might I suggest this, this, and this one to start). I wish I’d opted for waterproof mascara.

I arrive, park, earn a sideways glance from a guy sitting in the car next to mine with his window open and realize I’m still talking to my invisible people. Whatever. By this point, I’m near-delirious with joy.

The talk goes well. I sell a few books, meet some wonderful folks, and in keeping with the Bob Ross approach to book marketing, have possibly lined up another talk or three.

And you can bet I won’t be going into any of them alone.

If you’re reading this and you’ve shown me love, thanks for being in my car today. Know that tomorrow morning when I sit down in front of that unnervingly empty page, I’m bringing you with me again.

Don’t go in alone.

Bring your people with you.

They’ve got you.

You’ve got this.

—

RACHEL STONE writes stories of hope and redemption, set against vibrant Canadian backdrops. Her debut novel THE BLUE IRIS has won multiple awards, and her acclaimed lyric essays have appeared in international journals, magazines and blogs. She lives near Toronto, Canada with her family. Join Rachel on Substack for The Launch Diaries: Reflections, Lessons, Real Talk and Confessions from a Debut Author.

https://linktr.ee/rachelstoneauthor

IG: @racheystone FB: RachelStoneAuthor  X: @rachestone

THE BLUE IRIS

“Such a unique and heartwarming story about found family…” -Tracey Lange, NYT Bestselling Author of We Are The Brennans

Sometimes, uprooting the thorn-filled past is the only way we bloom. . .

Tessa Lewis is set to embark on a Big-Time Career and marry Toronto’s fastest-rising lawyer, who loves her to pieces. But when a visit to a flower market from her childhood sparks memories of the mother she lost too soon, Tessa puts her bright future on hold to work there, determined to come to terms with her past.

At the Blue Iris Flower Market, everything is blossoming except the rag-tag crew, each hiding deep scars of their own. When Sam, the beloved but troubled man in charge, takes off and leaves the market reeling, Tessa and her unlikely new friends come face-to-face with their most uncomfortable truths, uprooting lives carefully cultivated-and just maybe, unearthing everything they’ve ever wanted.

Told from multiple perspectives, The Blue Iris is an intricately woven exploration of love tested beyond its limits, chosen family, and the beauty that grows in letting go.

BUY HERE

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