Criticism Is My Best Friend

By Michele Kwasniewski

I’d like to introduce you to one of my best friends. It could become one of your best friends, too,  if you have an open mind, a firm grip on who you are and consider change an opportunity for growth. Please meet criticism. Constructive criticism is its full name. Feedback is its nickname, but let’s just call it criticism for short.

I think it’s safe to say no one really likes criticism despite encountering it every day in some form or other. Even if presented in a positive way, it is difficult to listen to someone point out that you are doing something wrong. Criticism is that dressing room mirror urging you not to buy that string bikini at age forty-eight. It’s the instructor of the kickboxing class yelling at you to stop being lazy and lift that leg higher. And sometimes it’s that delightful driver behind you on the freeway waving select fingers and blaring their horn because you neglected to signal before switching lanes.  

But constructive criticism is necessary, especially if you are a writer. It’s akin to your dearest friend in the world who tells you clearly, kindly, but in no uncertain terms that you should not call your ex after drinking a bottle of wine, or eat that eight-day old chicken curry in your fridge or quit your job to become a singer because you had a great set at karaoke last night. Like your most trusted confidant, criticism can help you improve your manuscript or advise that you are on a path that is not viable and that more thought is needed. Acknowledging that certain aspects of a storyline aren’t working is the only way writers can make the necessary changes to produce the best work possible.  

So how, as writers, do we know which criticisms to accept and which ones to reject? How can we open ourselves to valid criticism and not crumble?  

Let me be clear, not every criticism can be labeled constructive. Some are disguised as constructive criticism but are really just negative comments or personal opinions.  

If criticism is done in a mean spirit or with ill-intentions, it is not only unhelpful, it can be damaging. It is unwise to entertain any changes to your work based on rude or insulting feedback, especially with no suggestion for a solution accompanying the comment. 

Instead, constructive criticism offers insight to plot or character issues you might not have seen or a storyline that just doesn’t work. Often, writers are too involved with their projects to have any perspective on how a piece will be perceived by readers. I enjoy conversations with my beta readers because we can discuss their impressions of my manuscript, and I can share my thought-process while I was writing.

Together we usually come to a better understanding of the story. We don’t always agree, but hearing the impressions of a wide variety of beta readers makes me a better storyteller. I can clarify passages, sharpen descriptions and perhaps delete unnecessary passages or story points. It also helps me validate my story choices when I can explain something clearly to a questioning reader. It is an experience I welcome.

We are the engineers of our story, so ultimately we have the luxury of choosing how to tell it and what to include. If I receive a piece of feedback I sincerely disagree with, I usually wait to see if another reader brings up the same point. If more than a few readers bring up the same point, I will take action. But if it is something I firmly believe in, I ignore the criticism and trust my instincts as a storyteller.

As a writer, you have to know who you are and the story you are trying to tell before you ask for feedback on your work.  If not, you will be hopelessly tossed about in a sea of conflicting opinions, unsure of which direction to pursue.

Is there anything that can make it to easier hear negative feedback when you’ve put your heart and soul onto a page for someone to read?  The only way to remove the sting of criticism is to realize that any honest feedback your writing receives is not a personal attack on you. It is the opinion of a reader about your writing that they are fully entitled to have. Knowing your work is having an effect on people is one of the many reasons most people write.

It is something to be grateful for…that your work moves people enough to have an opinion at all. You have the power to embrace it or discard it. But I firmly believe each and every book I have written has been enriched and improved by the constructive criticism I have received. I consider reader feedback a part of my writing process. 

The next time someone gives you feedback on your work, try to appreciate it as a roadmap to improvement rather than as an attack.  Everything we write is a small piece of ourselves that we share with the world.  Constructive criticism gives you the perspective you need so your writing can be the greatest impact possible.

Happy writing!

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After graduating from Loyola Marymount University with a BA in Technical Theater, Michele Kwasniewski spent over fifteen years in film and television production. She worked as a set production assistant on movies such as Independence Day, Face/Off Primal Fear, and Evita and as a production coordinator/manager on television shows including Big Brother, and many TCL, HGTV, and Discovery series. She is also a proud member of the Producers Guild of America. Michele’s colorful experiences in the industry inspired her to write The Rise And Fall Of Dani Truehart series. Michele lives in San Clemente, California with her husband, their son, and a disobedient dachshund. Rising Star is her first novel.

Find out more about her on her website https://michelekwasniewski.com/

Follow her on Insta https://www.instagram.com/michelekwas

Rising Star

In the first book in The Rise And Fall Of Dani Truehart series, Rising Star, fifteen-year-old Dani Truehart is living a life that is not quite her own. Driven by her mother’s desire for fame and fortune, she has spent her childhood dutifully training for a career as a pop star. On the brink of discovery, doubts begin to creep into Dani’s mind as she questions her own desire for fame, and she wonders whether she can trust the motivations of the adults who are driving her forward.

Following a brilliant audition arranged by her vocal/dance coach and former ’80s pop icon Martin Fox, Dani is thrown full-force into the music industry. She leaves her friends, family and scheming mother behind to move with Martin, who has become her legal guardian, into the Malibu compound of her new manager, Jenner Redman. Jenner, the former swindling manager of Martin’s boy band, leverages what’s left of his depleted fortune to launch Dani’s career.

Isolated from her life at home and trying to stay apace with her demanding schedule, Dani struggles to keep in touch with those she loves, connect to her withholding mother and find her voice as an artist. With Martin and Jenner at odds over their rocky past and finding herself unprepared to handle the pressures of her future singing career, Dani’s debut album and future stardom are at risk of falling apart.

 

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