Give Yourself Permission to Pivot: The Ability to Change your Mind 

By Jennifer Todling 

This fall, I originally had five solo trips planned for business retreats, milestone events and recording my audiobook. I love having time to myself and traveling on my own schedule where I get to indulge in my creative pursuits without distraction. During the pandemic, I somehow found the capacity to go back to graduate school, write a memoir and parent a toddler (thanks to tremendous support from my husband) and a lot of late night meanderings.  

But raising a kindergartner is a different territory. One that I cherish and struggle with since my little human has her own ideas on what life should look like. As I mentioned in my summer blog, my daughter and I made a pact that I would do my best to limit my trips to two to three days because that’s about how long we can bear to be a part. So planning fifteen total days away in a three-month period felt like a lot.  

When we returned from a summer of travel, I realized I really don’t like to fly and I can’t tolerate turbulence and each flight I kept counting how many more flights I had committed to for the year. A  mental countdown of what was left. But the trips I had planned weren’t obligation, they were meant for fun but there was an impending dread I had already placed upon them.  

So I decided to pivot, to change things in a way that served me best. That meant saying no to a couple trips all together, shortening others and finding ways to move my business work to a local venue to avoid a layover and week-long stay in the middle of winter. And the relief I felt from making these shifts was only instant.  

We are allowed to change our mind in what we have already committed to and I am striving to say no more to things on my to-do list.  

If we want to have space for creative expression, we need to give ourselves permission to pivot when needed without apology. There are lots of different ways to go after our dreams. What way will serve you best? 

You got this! For the world needs who you were made to be.  

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Author Bio: Jenn Todling is an author, speaker, executive coach, as well as an adjunct instructor at  the University of Denver as part of its Frontline Manager Leadership Program. Formerly an audit  partner at a global Big 4 accounting firm with over twenty years of professional services experience and an ICF-certified transformational leadership coach for over ten years, Jenn helps her clients  express their soul in their work and life. A lover of adventure, travel, and dance, she currently  resides near her hometown of Boulder, Colorado, with her husband (and dance partner), and young  daughter. Her debut memoir Dancing on My Own Two Feet will be available April 2025. Learn more  at jenntodling.com.  

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DANCING ON MY OWN TWO FEET

An inspirational book club read of one woman’s journey of taking the bold step to leave her disabled—and volatile—spouse and moving across the country in search of adventure, tango, and love.

At the tender age of twenty, Jenn faces a pivotal moment when her boyfriend, Morey, proposes marriage after only a few weeks of dating. Her intuition urges her to say no, but she’s spent the entirety of her teenage years caregiving for family; she yearns for adventure, and she thinks relocating to California with Morey will give her the freedom she craves. So she says yes—only to find herself back in the caregiver role after he becomes disabled a few years into their marriage. But it’s Morey’s volatile personality that ultimately leads Jenn to make a brave decision: it’s time to leave.

Dancing on My Own Two Feet takes a poignant turn as Jenn relocates to New York City after her divorce. Here, she rediscovers a long-forgotten passion for dance and embarks on a transformative journey that transcends the physicality of movement. Each dance becomes a channel to tap into her inner wisdom, providing the courage to explore the world and embrace new adventures. Then Jenn encounters Gable, a potential suitor, prompting new questions to arise for her: Is she better off on her own? Or could Gable be the love and dance partner she’s been longing for?

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Tags: featured, women writers

Category: On Writing