Having an Affair With Your Writing

Recently I completed my first young adult novel. As anyone writing a book can attest, it was a long slog. Personally, I wouldn’t have been able to complete it were it not for two creative sources of inspiration that rocked my world in a major way—Broadway’s Hamilton and Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic.

Let me back up: Last fall, my writing had stalled. I’d completed a bad first draft during 2015’s NaNoWriMo (my first time participating in the annual challenge). In the months that followed, I wrote just 60 more pages of a second draft. As the mother of a precocious toddler and a woman with a fast-paced media relations career, I’d fallen into the trap of believing I didn’t have time for the creative outlet of fiction. I’d also started to question my ambition and ability to ever finish a book.

That’s when I discovered Gilbert’s Big Magic. The book (along with the Magic Lessons podcast that preceded it) came into my life at the perfect moment. It gave me permission to dream artistically. To stick with my creativity, no matter the circumstances, but especially when things stopped being easy. I ended up dog-earring so many of its pages that by the time I finished, my copy had nearly doubled in size.

In my favorite passage, Gilbert suggested to her readers to “have an affair” with their work. “Stop treating your creativity like it’s a tired, old, unhappy marriage (a grind, a drag) and start regarding it with the fresh eyes of a passionate lover,” she wrote.

The idea stuck with me. That October, when a series of work and family commitments forced me to back out of a writing retreat I’d been accepted into, I grew discouraged once more. But because I love the craft as much as I do, I kept clawing my way back to the page. I knew Gilbert would have been proud of even the days when I could snag no more than fifteen minutes alone with my creativity.

Around that time I also began to hear about Broadway’s Hamilton, a history lesson-cum-hip-hop musical that was wowing the nation. I bought the cast recording and listened to it one night as I was preparing my family’s Thanksgiving meal, trying not to cry as I put the finishing touches on a pumpkin crisp.

Something about Hamilton sparked a serious creative renewal in me. Only in hindsight, as I devoured Hamilton: The Revolution (the book that offers a backstage glimpse into its making) did I recognize what it was.

Poring over a section in which fellow artists shared their thoughts about the musical, I read these words from Tony Award-winning composer John Kander (Cabaret, Chicago): “I came away feeling like writing. Not writing like Lin, or doing a project like that—it was just that really, really good work makes me want to go to work.”

I could relate. Feeling exuberant and inspired, in late December I booked myself a hotel for two nights. It felt like the ultimate indulgent move—who was I to deserve such a get-away?—but a necessary one to regain my creativity legitimacy as an artist. There, by myself, I wrote like I was “running out of time.” (Hamilton fans will get the reference to the show’s popular song ‘Non-Stop’!)

By the end of those two days, I’d slept less than ten hours, skipped more than a few meals, but had taken control of my manuscript. By the time I checked out, I was on a crazy-level creative high, making a New Year’s resolution to finish my book in 2016.

It took me a few more weekends this spring to get there (ones that involved long stretches of time spent away from my child and spouse so I could “make out with my art,” as Gilbert might say) but I did it. On a Friday in April, at around 2 a.m., I typed the words “The End”. It was such a euphoric moment, realizing that while everyone else in my house was asleep, I’d validated my ability to be creative whenever and however I could.

Now I face the gauntlet of querying the book and finding an agent. As daunting as the process can be, I know that whatever happens, this manuscript is the one that made me a true artist, someone who knows how great it feels to persist to the final page and looks forward to repeating the process all over again.

In Hamilton: The Revolution, the show’s creator, Lin-Manuel Miranda, says of the creative process: “Just keep going until you figure it out.”

That’s exactly what I did with this novel of mine. Along the way, I realized I didn’t need anyone’s permission to be a writer. I just needed to make the necessary sacrifices to stick with the work required. Because I did, I fell in love not only with my own creativity, but that of these two remarkably talented artists as well.

 

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Gail Werner is a fiction writer from Indiana who is on the planning committee for the Midwest Writers Workshop. In addition to her writing career, she is a freelance editor (who can’t believe she gets paid to read); an avid photographer (who in a past life documented couples’ weddings); a yoga enthusiast; and pop culture junkie.

Find out more about her on her website: www.gailwerner.com

Follow her on Twitter: https://twitter.com/gailwerner

 

 

Gail Werner

www.gailwerner.com

@gailwerner

Tags: featured. Liz Gilbert, inspiration, women writers

Category: Contemporary Women Writers, How To and Tips