Why Writing Is Important to Me
Women Writers, Women Books asked me write about why writing is so important for me.
I wouldn’t be being honest if I said I was someone who couldn’t not write; that my fingers are drawn magnetically to the pen or keyboard; that it’s like breathing to me.
That’s just not how it is for me. I managed to survive despite not writing regularly for most of my life.
Of course, I wrote when I was at school, when I was told to write, and told what to write. I wasn’t too bad at it, according to my grades. I wrote essays at university – not very well, I hasten to add. But the reason I didn’t write them very well was because my heart wasn’t in it.
In hindsight, I can see I took the wrong degree, but that’s a whole other blog post! I wrote a short story for no particular reason while I was at university, which was good, I thought at the time. Well, it had promise anyway! I wrote a journal to my first daughter while I was pregnant to her. And then I wrote a whole load more essays for my breastfeeding counsellor diploma. Now this course I loved. I threw myself into it, and got very good comments and grades for all my essays. Based on the grades I was getting, had it been a degree, I would have got a first!
That’s when I first realised that maybe I was good at writing, and I went on to sporadically write a handful of articles for my local NCT (UK childbirth charity) newsletter, and a big article for their specialist workers’ (breastfeeding counsellors, ante-natal teachers and post-natal group leaders) professional journal, which was very well received and also gave me a lot of confidence.
I wrote that article over four years ago, though, and have written very little since then, despite thinking repeatedly that I’d like to be a writer. I would dismiss the thought very quickly as something un-doable, and worked instead on a series of other projects that I hoped would lead onto a long term career, something that was difficult as I am the full-time carer for my four children.
I tried being a real nappy seller; opening a natural parenting shop; selling slings and baby carriers; and designing, sewing and selling handbags. I’m not a good saleswoman, though, and, more importantly, I think that that sort of thing just wasn’t the right thing for me.
A few months ago, when I talked to my father-in-law about my latest plan – to do a PhD – he gave me a beautiful moleskine notebook to write my notes in, despite being way, way off any possible study. He was very encouraging.
I found myself desperate to write in the notebook, but I didn’t know what to write, or how. I would open the notebook and stare at it, pen poised, and then close it again.
I posted on my favourite internet forum: ‘how do you write in new notebooks?’, thinking I must be very strange to not be able to do it. But I got a whole host of responses from people saying they were the same. Apparently one company will even draw a line across the first page so that their customers don’t feel too scared to write in it!
Someone suggested I write with a pencil – it flows better, apparently.
So I bought some pencils and took myself and my new notebook to a local library. I found a table, sat down, opened the notebook and wrote ‘what are you frightened of?’
This is a special phrase to me – something I ask myself and my daughters when we’re getting distressed. I followed the phrase with the date and wrote a whole page of my thoughts – they just kept spilling out. I’ll type it up one day and put it on my blog. I ended the page with: ‘or do I just write, and see what happens? I’m going to start.’
I turned the page and wrote: ‘Susie walked down her road towards her house…’
I wrote nearly every day in my notebook, watching this incredible creative process as my story developed. I finished my long-hand first draft at 40,000 words. Not nearly long-enough for a novel, but I knew that the prose and plot were very sparse and would fill out on re-writes. I knew this because as I was writing it, I was also studying the craft of writing – reading blogs; reading books; talking to other writers; getting things critiqued; critiquing others’ work; joining a writers’ group.
I started on 18 March this year. And here I am now, writing this over three months later, and still writing, writing, writing.
Writing has changed my life. I am calmer and happier. My children are writing more. I am a better parent. I haven’t had a truly depressive episode in all that time. And I am achieving something. I am achieving the creation of significant parts of stories and articles every single day and it feels so good!
I still don’t feel an undeniable compulsion to write. I can live without writing. But I want to do it simply because I enjoy it and it is good for me. I never want to stop.
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Category: British Women Writers, Contemporary Women Writers, On Writing
I really love this post. And I agree with some of the other comments. I believe all of us are either writers or we’re not, though anyone could argue that everyone is a writer in some shape or form. It is a special journey, the one you go on figuring yourself out.
Moleskine notebooks are a savior for me. I used to “journal” as a teen, though I use that term lightly because it was mostly covering gossip in math class and the freckles of my then-crush-not-fiance. I quit for a while and tried blogging, but my topics were so broad it fell apart like sand. A year ago, with a Christmas gift card to Barnes & Noble, I purchased a large set of three Moleskine notebooks. The first was for writing elements. Ideas. Images. Plot run-throughs. Character sketches. The beginnings of flash fictions. The second started out to be the notebook for my novel, though I abandoned it shortly after during a reread of the plot. The third, however, has been sitting empty on my shelf for almost a year. Until I picked it up in September. And you are so right, the first page is daunting. So I put a date on it and started writing. About anything. Everything. It ended up being a social commentary about my mother’s traditional values and stemmed into my own fears and insecurities. It was fantastic!
Journaling/writing freehand can really set you free! I encourage you to not only try your hand at novel-length stories, but try some shorter pieces as well. Flash fiction. Experimental work. They’re great mediums and journaling and stream-of-consciousness really helps with them. Great post 🙂
…it curious because it is that we are either writers are we are not. And you are. I was on a train over 10 years ago and happened upon a journalist and we struck up a great conversation. In the end she was chastising me for not being the writer I was inside. She said she could see it; and that any writer could have picked up on it. I walked a way with a smile that day, knowing that we writers can not hold back the sea of what is inside begging to come out. Enjoy the gift.
You have the best possible reason to write. You will have blank page days, because that’s life. But then you can climb Robinswell Hill (I know it well – I’m in Wiltshire) and find inspiration there.
Love your comment on why writing is important to you – because you enjoy it and it’s good for you. My feelings exactly! x
I’m glad you had your Eureka! moment and are now writing regularly. It’s what keeps us sane, I believe.
Thank you, Nettie x