Once an Immigrant, Always an immigrant!
Clasping a big folder with every document that could prove our existence, my parents and I stood at San Francisco airport waiting for our turn. The words, “Welcome to the United States of America,” dazzled above the immigration officer.
It seemed like hours had passed since we got off our flight from India. The lines seemed to grow, but we also seemed stuck in the exact position. I looked around and watched people as I tried to calm my nerves. I looked over and saw the citizens-and-residents line that seemed way shorter than the visitor line we were on.
I looked over and saw my mom in her pants and t-shirt near me. I did not recognize this “new mother” standing near me. In all my years on this planet, my mother always had a sari draped around her. I watched as she stood confidently in her pants and t-shirt. She clearly did not look like someone who was wearing pants for the first time in her life. I dazzled at the transformation that we made in twenty-four hours. We had left India in our Indian garb and had reached America in pants and t-shirt. I adjusted my very tight jeans. I was told I couldn’t wear my baggy jeans and big shirts in America. America was already changing my life, and I hated it.
As we neared the counter, the officer asked us, “What is the purpose of your visit?”
“Employment,” my mom said as she handed one paper after another.
I was extremely nervous to think. I watched intently as I realized Americans hardly smiled. I did not feel welcome standing at the counter, watching this officer scrutinize our papers.
I could feel my legs vibrating. I felt like I was going to fall down if I did not rest against the counter. Every little movement on our end made the officer look our way before looking down again. He stared at me as he looked at the picture on my passport.
After a barrage of questions, he stamped our passports. He handed all the papers to us as he said those words we had waited for, “Welcome to the United States of America” and a bonus offer––he actually cracked a smile at us. I wasn’t sure if I was more intrigued by his smile or being welcomed into America.
We breathed a sigh of relief and quickly walked out in case he changed his mind. That was more than seventeen years ago. Since that day, I have walked through the port of entry many times at several different countries, yet walking into the port of entry in America makes me nervous and jittery. Since that day, I have graduated into the citizens-and-residents line. Yet, the wounds of that first entry into America remain raw. I shudder and stammer when spoken to at the port of entry. I will always be that seventeen-year-old immigrant who nervously and sheepishly walked into America.
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Chaithanya Sohan immigrated to the U.S. from India in 2001. She received a bachelor’s in electrical engineering from San Jose State University and a master’s from Santa Clara University, and now works in Silicon Valley. She began writing for various websites in 2002 and decided to pen “America Deconstructed” in 2013. She has also authored pieces on political issues for One Earth One Mission and www.rethinkreality.com. She enjoys traveling and runs www.nomadicsue.wordpress.com and www.wordspeare.wordpress.com. She and her husband, Denell Hopkins, live in Newark, California, with their daughter, Maya, puppy Zed and her parents.
Naseer was nine years old when he escaped Taliban and fled Afghanistan. His story, “There are some people who are coming to take me away”, chronicles the resilience of a nine year old boy as he traveled from Afghanistan to America in his quest for the American dream. “I saw a ripe mango I’d like to pluck” showcases the love story of Chidibere and Ifeyinwa and their struggles with language, culture and being African in America. In the story “Kosovo, really…cool”, Lisian takes us through his journey to America and often being asked his identity in spite of being white.
In the story “I am exotic, mocha, P-diddy”, Parag describes his journey from a young sixth grader who hid his attraction to boys in conservative India to embracing his sexuality in America. America Deconstructed follows the journeys of sixteen immigrants as they maneuver cultural differences, accents and uncomfortable situations while feeling a sense of belonging in America.
Category: Contemporary Women Writers, On Writing
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