Inspiration for Happy AF by Beth Romero
Inspiration for Happy AF by Beth Romero
Many people ask me what inspired Happy AF: Simple Strategies to Get Unstuck, Bounce Back, and Live Your Best Life. As the title attests, it is a comprehensive guidebook for happiness. I always respond that I didn’t set out to write a book, but rather the book set out to right me. Yes, I always had “writing a book” (topic unknown) on my bucket list, but I never thought it would be a book about happiness.
I once heard a speaker say, “The pain pushes you until the vision pulls you,” and I think that pretty much sums up the origin story of my book. 2020 was the perfect storm in every aspect of my life that didn’t just knock the wind from my sails—it sank the entire ship. Rock bottom. Lowest of lows. Sometimes, it’s hard to pinpoint precisely when and where the decline started. I think of mine as a slow decay that gained ferocious momentum during the pandemic of 2020, kind of like an avalanche; any given factor, in and of itself, might not be a big deal, but taken all together, the drifts can prove catastrophic. It’s an insidious process, and “suddenly” you’re in chaos when, in reality, there’s nothing sudden about it.
A romantic break-up seven years far past its expiration date. Losing my job the week after I closed on a new home. Losing my beloved father to COVID-19 in the very early stages of the pandemic. Social isolation. All of it contributed to a crippling depression that essentially rendered me emotional roadkill. I was at rock bottom—a fact further underscored the day I realized I was walking around the house with my head down. I mean literally, not figuratively.
This realization was a rude awakening. I couldn’t believe I’d let my circumstances defeat me in the way that they had. I knew then that I needed to pivot ASAP for myself and my two beautiful children. I was determined to do whatever it took, whatever was recommended, whatever worked to move the needle from rock bottom to mountaintop. I drank from the fire hydrant of positive psychology and voraciously read articles, research papers, and books on the topic. I’m passionate about research and clinical data supporting all theoretical premises. Otherwise, it’s merely conjecture or opinion.
Researchers determined that three primary factors affect happiness levels, and only 10 percent of happiness is determined by external circumstances. Genetics (50 percent) and intentional activities (40 percent) make up the primary pieces of the pie. This was a very powerful revelation for me. It suggests that intentional activities offer the most promising means to increase and sustain levels of happiness.
I became an intentional warrior about everything—thoughts/affirmations, diet, sleep, exercise, gratitude, faith, social support, vision, and goals, etc. Literally everything. Cultivating happiness is a constant practice. Your daily life, ergo your state of mind, is dictated by your daily choices—day in, day out. Small, consistent steps are the foot soldiers that win the crusade for hope and happiness. You have to be in it to win it. This means living with intention and not just operating on autopilot; creating a life based on choices, not habits; and practicing the sort of person you want to be each day.
Sounds simple? It is. But it’s not easy. It takes commitment and intention. Full stop.
Once on the other side of depression, I decided to repurpose the pain. For some reason, recounting my journey from roadkill to redemption was important. I wanted to share the simple strategies that helped me escape from rock bottom. And once I started, the words poured from what felt like the floodgates of my soul. Corny, perhaps, but gutting yourself in black and white print can be even more harrowing than having lived it in Technicolor. Unsure where it was heading, I was willing to let the words lead.
Writing a research-based book adds a different dimension to the work and workload. But for me, knowledge is power, and researching the clinical data was enlightening and affirming. Without the data, it would simply be more autobiographical than a comprehensive self-help guide. The clinical data provides supporting evidence for the efficacies of the strategies discussed in the book. It was important for me to deliver the data in a way that was easily digestible and fun to read as opposed to literary melatonin.
A quote from Brené Brown served as my guiding principle while writing the book. Simply stated, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.” This was such a beautiful notion of paying it forward, removing any grandiose inklings of ego from the equation and instead focusing on what someone else may possibly gain from my story. It rendered the idea purposeful and far beyond any bossy autobiographical trope. I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe I was meant to read those very words at that very moment and was being prodded to continue forward with my dream. So, I did, and what a gift it was. There are silver linings everywhere if you are willing to look for them.
I don’t regret the dark threads that color my life tapestry as it’s part of its ultimate beauty. Part of my story. I emerged more present, compassionate, and grateful. Resilient and stronger. Softer even. But most importantly, I am rooted by having happiness habits be the norm rather than the exception. That way, next time a storm comes (and it will come), my happiness will not be easily swayed, helpless like a leaf in the wind. And that is my wish for everyone.
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Beth Romero was born and raised in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. After a thirty-year sojourn on the West Coast, she recently moved back to Philadelphia. In addition to having made her a pizza aficionado, her Italian American, East Coast background inspires the straightforward, humorous, and self-deprecating narrative style that characterizes her writing. (As every good cook knows, the secret is the salt.)
With a background and degree in psychology, Beth channeled her creativity into a successful sales and branding career. From Veep to Boss to Happiness Junkie, persuasive storytelling is her superpower. She showcases those skills to their fullest in this practical and entertaining how-to guide for happiness.
Feeling crappy? Wanna be happier? Wanna up your game?
Happy AF is your comprehensive roadmap for happiness. Drawing heavily from neuroscience, positive psychology, and behavioral science, the straightforward strategies and exercises in this how-to guide will teach you how to strengthen your happiness muscle and live up to your greatest potential.
Happiness junky Beth Romero serves up a life-affirming parable laced with contextual how-tos—all backed by clinical research—in fresh, insightful, and accessible language you can relate to. Kinda like your best friend giving it to you straight (with love) over cocktails. In this book, you will discover:
* the art of letting go
* proven ways to jiu-jitsu your negative thoughts to transform your life
* how goals, vision, purpose are the stepping-stones to greatness
* the importance of gratitude and grace in your happiness journey
* the scientific link between sleep, morning routines, diet, and exercise on your mental well-being
* and much, much more!
Happiness is a choice—and it’s within your reach. If you do the work. If you believe. Much like Dorothy with her ruby slippers, the power is always within you . . . just waiting for you to access it. So get ready to click your Manolos, Dr. Martens, or Adidas and find your happy place.
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Category: Contemporary Women Writers, On Writing
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