On Writing ‘Love Amongst the Fear’ by Kim Pavy
Last year I decided to challenge myself by writing my first book – and at the same time re-entered the workforce as a Registered Nurse. I’ve spent my entire professional life as a nurse surrounded by individuals from all walks of life – I’ve learnt what it means to read people and to acknowledge that the world isn’t just black and white. Human nature and the will to survive are strongly embedded in our souls. My time working particularly with sick babies cemented the notion that the survival instinct is strong from birth.
Love Amongst the Fear was created by different parts of what make me whole. These parts include my professional and personal life, my experience with a stalker and the life altering moment when I decided to fully retire!
In July 2024 I retired and thought that I would embark on a great journey of exploration to discover what my life could be. Six weeks into my retirement, on a regular Wednesday afternoon, my vivid imagination reared its head and demanded to be used. My brain needed stimulation; I thought I was going to lose my mind if I didn’t do something as soon as humanly possible! After visiting a local lolly shop and getting high on sugar, the thought of writing for fun – not the tedious sludge of studying – came to me. Really, if someone had told me then that I would end up writing a book and getting it published, I would have laughed at them. Retirement opened a world to me I had no idea I could be a part of. Writing has enriched my life and given me a new future.
The first short story I ever wrote was called ‘The Woman in White’. It was based on local Caves Beach lore which told of the ghost of a young woman in a white pantsuit that is seen periodically late at night on our local highway. I wrote the story because when I was trying to figure out what I had seen, many locals had simply shrugged their shoulders at me, stating ‘yeah I’ve seen her, so what?’. I entered the Commonwealth Short Story competition and although I didn’t win, I became hooked on writing and have been so ever since!
Part of what I’ve learnt over my life and work is that love can take many forms. A lifetime of finding, enduring and even losing love is a powerful force for a woman. The women I have known wanted deep, meaningful and respectful love – what they didn’t seek was something obsessive and dangerous. Unfortunately, the ramifications of such dangerous ‘love’ are reported on in the media on an almost daily basis – it would seem to be all around us. But I would challenge anyone who would even call this kind of destructive connection ‘love’ – for how can something so possessive and violent which violates women’s autonomy and has the ability to turn them into indistinguishable statistics read out on the nightly news, how can this be love?
In my twenties, I lived for a short time with a stalker. Luckily for me, there was no social media or mobile phones to help the stalker track me, only landlines. The police at the time insisted that he had to be someone I knew and that I needed to be careful. It may have only lasted a couple of months, but it completely changed my behaviour. I became more aware of my own safety and of being watched. However, I choose to reflect on this as something that turned out to have a positive impact – it enhanced my resilience and fortified my determination never to let fear rule my life. When it finally came to considering the plot for my book, I remembered a friend telling me that writing about what you know makes the process easier – and so that’s what I did.
I grew up in a time when women were being given more opportunities to work and live a life that they wanted. We’ve come a long way, but we aren’t all the way there yet. There are some who still hold the antiquated belief that a woman can’t possibly look after herself. I choose to fight this notion in my writing by creating women who are 3-dimensional, not relegated to the background. Writing can project a more positive role model for women. We need strength and importance portrayed through our female characters. My protagonist, Belinda Stuart, is self-sufficient and experiences life on her own terms. She can be anything she wants to be.
My writing explores positive role models as well as the grey shades of humanity. It touches on survival and love, empowerment and struggle, and shows life as happy, sad, exciting, dark, and ever evolving. Love Amongst the Fear reflects all aspects of what it means to be alive. That’s why I enjoyed writing it!
—
Kim Pavy has worked across medical, surgical, midwifery, neonatal intensive care and now geriatric nursing. Starting with research articles before writing short stories and poems, she is now publishing her first novel. She practices Tai Chi and artmaking in her home on the North Coast of NSW which she shares with her dog Ruby.
In a moment she would be face-to-face with him, her unwanted stalker, her deprived monster.
In the historic country town of Haveshore, newly divorced Belinda Sturt hopes to build a better life for herself. Though welcomed by the community for her vivacity and quiet strength, she’s not sure if she’s ready for love again. That is, until she meets charming gym owner Kyle Wright.
Strong and sensitive, Kyle too is gun-shy of relationships. As their mutual attraction becomes impossible to ignore, the couple choose to take a chance on each other. Little do they know, they risk much more than just a broken heart.
Gaining the attention of a dangerous stalker, Belinda’s new life is thrown into jeopardy. Intent on making Belinda his next victim, the stalker isn’t playing games.
Driven by anger and fear and determined to protect her independence at all costs, Belinda contemplates taking the law into her own hands. But when the dust settles, will her love and her life still be standing?
BUY HERE
Category: On Writing
Subscribe
If you enjoyed this article, subscribe to receive more just like it.
